d_s_t_e's Wattpad Reviews

Just Once More by mahimahi2602 [Pokémon]

Just Once More is a Pokémon fanfic one shot from the perspective of N.  In it, he's reflecting on how much he misses White and wishes he could see her again.

The best thing about this one shot is that it has a lot of concrete details. It's good at describing White and the things that make her special from N's perspective. It's also pretty well written. Since the first time I read this, I think that every mistake I was able to spot has been corrected, which is something I certainly don't say very often.

The cover has both characters and looks nice, and the description is suitably simple. All in all, it presents a nice appearance.

The story also uses a lot of repetition, which can be a good thing. For me, though, I thought that the story overdid it, and it started to feel a little forced. Perhaps it would work out better if the sentence structure of the repeated pieces was switched up a little as the story progresses. If there's some kind of twist on the original idea or something new that can be added to it, it could retain interest more easily while perhaps also blending in more smoothly with what was said before it in the paragraph.

I like that the story was changed since the first time I read it so that we see some little scenes of White and N. Just for one example, I thought the joke she told about N's hair was so stupid that it was actually funny. Things like that made me kind of like White as she is presented here.

For me as a person who never actually played Black and White, though, I would have appreciated getting a few more details that would help me to better understand the specifics of his interactions with White. I am somewhat familiar with N as a character simply from reading other fanfics, but I feel as though this is a story that at least somewhat depends on the reader having a good knowledge of the games in question. For example, I didn't remember that N had left at the end of the game and I wasn't sure what kind of "stuff" he says to White in game.

On that note, I thought that some of the wording of the story was a bit awkward. Most of it reads smoothly, but there were a few sentences that stuck out a bit, like "His first thoughts about her were something along the lines of she was a complete mess". And words like "stuff" are generally vague and only really serve a purpose if they're being used colloquially to develop a character's voice or something similar.

Overall, though, I think that the story manages to evoke a sort of creepy and sinister feel that grows as the story progresses. It was a bit difficult for me to judge how a person reading the revised version for the first time would feel about it, but my guess was confirmed thanks to my friend NaivEevee . I think it's a good, clean one shot that could be enjoyable for a quick read.