d_s_t_e's Wattpad Reviews

Split by vxsania [Pokémon]

"She wanted to fall. To fall and sleep and never wake up. But before she hit the ground, she heard the voice of Life[:] 'I'm offering you a choice, Celaena.'"

The first thing I want to say about this one shot is that, in any story that handles sensitive topics like suicide, it's excellent that it starts out with a warning. I'm also happy that it offers suicide helpline numbers at the end, although I would be even more impressed if the author provided helplines for countries besides Australia where Wattpad is popular (Canada: 778-783-0177, UK: 116-123, US: 1-800-273-8255, and a complete list can be found through this link: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_suicide_crisis_lines).

This one shot was the winner of the Pokémon Watty Awards in 2016, and I have to say that it deserves it. It's easily one of my favorite one shots on the site, which is why I'm creating this review as one of my recommended reads.

From the very first paragraph, the story draws you in with great description. It's interesting, it's well-written, and it simultaneously draws you right into the action. This is a trend that continues throughout the entire thing, consistently providing vivid and surprising imagery, both surprising in terms of the plot progression it aids with and in terms of being just plain surprisingly good. This alone makes every part of the story seem better. When Xerneas makes an appearance, the way that it is described makes me genuinely feel like it is awesome. The fact that every sentence is clear and easy to understand allows the story to flow on smoothly, and the good use of language keeps me constantly enjoying what I'm reading.

Another great thing about this, especially for a one shot, is that the conflict doesn't need to be explained at all. It's there from the very first paragraph. It's shown to the reader through that excellent description, and it's so understandable and compelling that the author is absolutely correct in the decision to trust that the reader will be able to follow as it flows on from scene to scene. There's no unnecessary preamble, nothing is dragged on, and no unnecessary detours are taken. The plot carries the story, and it is strong.

I can feel the tension between Celaena and Xerneas from the first, and the dialogue between them only continues to build it. The dialogue also does an excellent job of bringing out the personalities of the two characters, and it allows Xerneas to show off its role as the powerful legendary that it is, the best example being when he delivers quite a chilling threat.

In fact, that threat is so good and its language so precise and polished that it's almost unbelievable that Xerneas would have made it up on the spot... and, indeed, it turns out that it didn't. That's another thing I love about this story. Every time a plot element makes me pause and think that it seems a little unrealistic, it turns out that it was actually meant to feel that way. Xerneas' speech sounds rehearsed because it has delivered it countless times before, a fact that the reader learns just at this point, which simultaneously resolves my doubt and draws me deeper into the story.

The only time when the story failed to do this was when Xerneas admitted to having gained a greater understanding of humans from his conversation with Celaena. I found it a bit difficult to believe, given what I just said about the basic form of this interaction having happened countless times before. Even so, it is a minor point that could have an easy explanation.

Other points in favor of the plot include the fact that Celaena makes what I believe to be the most convincing case possible in favor of her position, meaning that the story doesn't pull its punches, and realistic limitations on Xerneas' power, which serves to preserve the stakes in the fictional world as a whole as well as make this particular encounter stand out as a story that is clearly worth telling.

I also like the way the story ends, although I won't spoil it here.

My biggest issue with the story was that has some issues with dialogue formatting and commas. It's minor enough that a typical reader might not care but is still noticeable to readers such as myself.

From the descriptions to the dialogue to the plot itself, Split is one Pokémon fanfic that is definitely deserving of a read. If you want a great example of what a one shot can be, look no further.