Another Forever (Completed) [Wattys 2018]

13

Thomas walked silently beside me but I could feel his eyes on me the entire time. It only took about 20 minutes to get to the clearing. It lay directly between the woods and looks as if someone purposefully cleared it out for a home but abandoned it long ago.

Now it was growing with different wild flowers and grass. But my favorite part, was that it overlooked the lake. We weren't close enough to smell it, but you could clearly see it and I bet the sunrises are spectacular.

I lowered myself to the ground, letting out a gasp at the cold ground touches the bare skin on my legs. Dammit, I should have changed in to yoga pants at least.

Once, I was adjusted and comfortable, I look up and see Thomas just watching me with a small smile.

"Are you just going to stare like a creep or are you going to join me?" I stare up at him with the hint of a smirk.

"I am not a creep, I am your mate" He huffs as he lays next to me.

"Callin' it like I see it"

Another patch of silence washes over us. I am not sure what I want to say or if I want him to say something. I know the Cade shaped cloud still hangs over us, but I am nervous to actually confront it.

So I don't.

"I love the stars. In another life I would have loved to have been an astronomer I think." I can still feel his eyes on me "What about you?" I slowly turned to meet his gaze. Instead of being embarrassed that he was caught, he gives me a small smile and scoots closer.

I can feel the sparks from where our arms are brushing together. I surprise myself by not pulling away.

"I'd want to be a pack doctor"

"Really? I had you pegged more as a warrior type" I turn my gaze back to the stars.

"All I have ever wanted to do was help people."

"Cade use to say the same thing growing up." I squeeze my eyes shut, instantly realizing my mistake.

His blue eyes snap to meet mine and I can't pull away. I don't know why I said that. I didn't mean to - true the thought had popped in the back of my mind, but I didn't want to say it.

He looked away. It was hard to read the expression on his face - was it anger or hurt?

"Are you going to reject me as your mate?" his voice was hard as he stared straight ahead towards where the sun would be rising soon.

"N-No. I-I'm -"

"Don't try to sugar coat this" He stood up so fast, it took me a minute to register that he was now pacing in front of where I sat.

"I'm no -"

"Don't lie to me Hailey."

I stood up and stepped into his path so he would be forced to look at me. The anger that radiated off of him confused me. He won't even let me speak, explain my hesitation.

His hands were shaking and his eyes swirled between blue and black. He was trying to keep reign on his wolf. I slowly put my hands on his arms and I felt him tense beneath my touch before his blue eyes met mine.

"Thomas, I don -"

Don't. Lie. To. Me" He stated through clenched teeth. I crossed my arms in front of my chest and gave him the deadliest glare that I could. Now it's me fighting my wolf for control.

"If you would let me finish! I planned on telling you the truth, but you won't even give me a chance to answer!"

His face softened a bit at my words, but I still glared at him. He reached his hand out to me, but I stepped out of the way. It was my turn to be pissed now. I don't know what got in his Wheaties, but I know what (or should I say who) got into mine.

"I'm Sorry." he sighed running his hand through his hair "It's just that the thought of someone loving you before and you're clearly still not over him." He looked at the ground sadly and my wolf stilled and whimpered at the sight.

"He never marked me, you know." I said quietly.

Thomas' eyes leave the ground and meet mine and his head tilts unconsciously in confusion.

"Why wouldn't he mark you?" He asks slowly. 

"I didn't feel the bond when he did. Everyone thought, maybe on my eighteenth birthday, but Cade didn't make it. I was a forced shift the day he - "My heart aches with all this talk of Cade and my eyes water with the memories.

His eyes meet mine and I swear I can see my pain reflected back in his blue eyes. A thought crosses my mind in that instant.

If I am his second chance, does that make me his? 

The thought sends a pang of jealousy to my chest.

"You're so Beautiful" His words catch me off guard but my heart reacts immediately, thumping wildly in my chest.

He slowly brings his right hand up and pushes some hair behind my ear before sliding his hand down my cheek and tracing the corner of my lips. His left hand somehow managed to settle around my waist and my hands unconsciously rest on his shoulders.

His eyes flit down to my lips for a moment. Our noses skim each other and my mouth moves without my consent.

"Did you have another mate?" I feel Thomas tense beneath my touch.

He steps away releasing me from his grip and ran his hands down his face with a heavy sigh. My heart drops to my feet. I know I shouldn't feel any type of jealousy, especially given that I had Cade.

But the pain hurts a more than I realized. It's like a dull knife being pushed through your chest in slow motion and it just gets more painful with each breath.

"No" he said quietly "That's why I ran when I did."

"What?"

He sits on the ground and stares off into nothing. I am so confused. If he didn't have a mate before why is he upset?

"I realized that if I'm your second chance, that means one of two things. A) I had a first mate and for whatever reason she would never be mine or B) I never had a mate and was only an after thought for you when you lost Ca- erm...yours." My heart clenches at the sight of how heart broken he looks.

I never really thought about it like that. Should I be considered lucky that I had Cade as a mate for even a small amount of time? Or would it have been easier to just meet Thomas as my mate and never know that other mates were involved?

No. I can't bring myself to ever regret Cade and I can see why he is upset at the idea of having a first mate he never met.

And with how I've been acting, he thinks I don't want him. I have to name him understand.

"You're my mate. I just can't go as fast as normal mates go. Please understand that, Thomas." I sit beside him waiting for his reaction. Will he be angry at my choice?

"I love the way my name sounds coming from you." his knuckles drag along my cheek before his hand curls around the back of my neck.

I forget how to breathe when his warm lips press against my forehead. Butterflies dance in stomach and I can't tell if my heart is beating to fast or not at all.

"Slow as you need. Just as long as you're mine at the end of each day."

<3 <3 <3 <3

Double update in 24 hours! Yay!

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