She's a Rebel // Ben Finn x Princess

Chapter 21

Lazily, my eyelids took their time to open, allowing me to feel the body next to mine before I saw it. I smiled, remembering the night before; the warm skin was a welcome addition to my morning - the fact it belonged to Ben only made it sweeter. I snuggled closer to him, breathing in his existence like fresh air. The weak sunlight illuminated the adoration I was beginning to hold for the new small details I could notice about my lover from the shorter distance, such as the inexplicably brighter locks of blonde in his hair and how much longer his eyelashes were than mine.

"Ben?" I questioned, testing his consciousness. He murmured muffled affirmance, burying his face in my neck. I sighed, contented. The idea prevailed, despite my desire to wake up in that exact fashion every morning, that too many nights like the night before would condemn us to not having any nights together. "Why don't we just... go? You know, why don't we runaway?"

"And you'd be alright with that?" He responded, his lips skimming my skin, sending electric shocks down my spine. "You don't want a massive royal wedding, with mandatory attendance for everyone in the kingdom? What about showing off to Page in the most extravagant way possible?"

"Yeah, but wouldn't it be nice to be shameless about being together?" I looked down to his face, planting a light kiss on his forehead. It was unbelievable that I was actually in his arms and still had reservations. "Like, to just be with each other without worrying about what anyone else might say?"

"Why can't we do that now?" He asked, sitting up, detangling his limbs from mine. "Are you not as proud as I am to be a part of the best couple Albion's ever seen?" The disquiet in his eyes forced a sensation of cold fear into my soul; I joined him, sitting upright, and laced my fingers between his.

"Don't you think I'm just aching to climb that tower in Bowerstone market and scream about how amazing it is to be with you?" Ben gave me a frail smile. I realised then that it was probably the most viable time to explain to him exactly what had been going on. "But... I guess there is some stuff I haven't quite told you yet..."

As I gave him the unabridged tale - every painful conversation with Reaver, every chat with Page - I watched the emotions flicker across his face like pages of a book; confusion replaced by anger that turned into disbelief. I did my best to hide my face, frightened of what may come next. Ben was still struggling to understand the more obvious aspects by the time I reached the end.

"So..." He strung the word out, twisting it like bubblegum around his tongue, "you're saying that Logan and Mary have helped the Temple with their weird experiments and you have to break them up because Reaver's friends say so," I nodded solemnly, "and if you don't, he'll tell everyone about us?"

"Pretty much." I responded with a sigh, resting my head on his chest. "It's stupid but he won't let it go."

"Why is it so bad if everyone finds out about us, though? Is loving me such a bad thing?" The question was a reasonable one. It was easy to see why it was so simple for him - he had always been the one with the greater social standing. "I'm not exactly a peasant, am I? Wasn't it you that said that Albion hails me as their own?"

"Yeah..." I wistfully envisioned a world where it was as straightforward he made it sound, where I never had to leave the safety he symbolised. "It's just... trickier than that. Hobson, and the court in general, won't see our union as proper. They're only interested in lineage and how legitimate an heir would be." Ben twirled a long strand of my hair around his fingertip, gently, both of us watching the hurricane of light brown hairs. His thoughtfulness slightly worried me. "Especially with my brother wanting to become a Balverine, there's more to it than just telling them we're together. Can you even tell me where you come from, who your family is?"

"Why does that matter? Haven't I done enough for the crown that I've shown how worthy I am?" He stood, without looking at me, and began to get dressed. I looked to my fingernails, wishing I didn't care about my image enough to bite them. It had been obvious that this would happen, this conversation was inevitable, but it was more difficult than I had anticipated. "Are you honestly telling me that I have to prove myself?"

"Not to me, honey, not at all," I leaned forward, moving to him, although he still wouldn't look at me. "That's my point; we'll figure something out, but... I've got too much going on to risk this, right now. You make me feel... stronger, and if I didn't have that right now..." Ben's eyes met mine, finally, the cool blue calming me, reassuring me, granting me refuge. "We'll work it out, I promise."

"I have an idea." He told me, brushing his hand across my cheek. I sighed into his touch. "I don't know if it'll work, and I'm not sure I can even do it, but it could solve all of our problems." The air in the room seemed somehow static, solid. As he pulled his jacket on, I found myself caught, like a living statue, unable to move. I tried to form words, syllables, but all I could manage was soundless empty utterances. "I'll do anything if it means I can be with you." I just nodded. Ben kissed me, quickly, almost regretfully, and I couldn't shake the feeling that it was a goodbye. He turned to me before opening the door. "Do you trust me, Rose?"

"Always." Without hesitation, the word escaped me. I couldn't help but revel in his smile - the first genuine one of the morning. I missed him already, and he hadn't left yet. "How long will it take?"

His short laugh, followed by, "I'll be back before you need me," ensured that I would be constantly worried until he returned.