She's a Rebel // Ben Finn x Princess

Chapter 23

The nights were worse than the days. It would take me hours to fall into a fitful, restless slumber and I awakened far before dawn. Distracting, meaningless tasks only worked for a short amount of time, until I had finished every stupid thing I had left over - signed every form, written to every society, read every plea. Occasionally, I berated myself for being so miserable; how could I be so lost without a guy I had been romantically involved with for all of three days? It had all happened so fast, and months had passed since. We were the definition of a whirlwind romance. But, still...

It felt like he had died. And taken my hope with him.

I stared at the ceiling, the flickers of candlelight casting dancing shadows around the room. I remembered, dimly, like that faded photograph my mother had with her sister, the few moments we had shared. I ached for the way it had been, simple and effortless and beautiful. Details were sealed in my mind like a locked vault; I had spent so much time appreciating the moments we spent together that the images hung as tapestries in my mind. The visions calmed me, halted the emptiness and eased me into a shallow rest. I called to mind the warmth - what Ben represented - a perpetual sunrise, the Auroran sands, a soft heartbeat.

A few undeterminable units of time passed. I was unable to keep track of the speed of those nights, even if I had wanted to. There was a sound, a quiet creak. I ignored it, though whether due to apathy or dreamy haziness, it was unclear. Shortly after, there was the sound of soft footsteps across the carpeted floor of my chambers. I reacted slightly, but only turning to face the noise. In the waning candlelight, I saw Ben.

"Sorry for coming in through the window, dreadful etiquette, I know." He whispered, his voice soft and melodic. All of my recounted memories didn't even slightly match the beautiful tones I was hearing. I murmured, comfortably. I held out my hand, to touch him, finally. Ben held it in his own, pressing his lips to the skin lightly, barely brushing it. I smiled, genuinely, and the expression felt almost foreign to me. I began to speak, but he quieted me. "Shhh, sorry, but I really had to wake you. It's been hell being apart from you."

"Join me," I requested, moving aside to make room. He did, almost stealthily, and immediately my arms embraced him. "I've missed you." My words got lost in the silent euphoria we shared. Laying my head on his chest, breathing in his scent, I felt an overwhelming sense of peace permeate my mood. I sighed into his skin. It was all so surreal; I could scarcely believe it was real... was it real?

"I've missed you too, darling," he replied, but it was far more enticing to pay attention to his rhythmic heartbeat instead of his words. The enchanting spell of comfort he had cast over me lulled me into an easy contentment. "And I have some great news. I managed to -"

"Mhmm," I interrupted, not wanting to think about anything other than how truly happy I was. My fingertips tangled in the hem of his shirt, twisting the fabric around my fist, as I struggled to decipher whether I was actually experiencing our reunion, or if I had just pined for it so long that I had gone fully insane. Either way, I was determined to enjoy it. "Shut up, Ben."

"Got it." He laughed, joyously, a sound like wind chimes and pulled me closer. I sighed, heavily, and he ran his hands through my hair, despite its horrific condition.

"I love you." The words escaped my throat without my conscious input. Hearing the truth ring in the air felt foreign. I sleepily looked up to his face, but his smile betrayed nothing. I found myself hoping, praying that I was dreaming. After all, we hadn't seen each other for weeks, what if he had only returned to tell me he was eloping with some woman he met... wherever he had gone? But surely, he wouldn't have literally broken into my chambers to say that. How did he even manage that? Hadn't we upped the security since the assassin from Ravenscar? Gods, why wasn't Ben saying anything?

"So we're saying that now, huh?" Ben kissed my forehead, lightly, chuckling slightly, breaking the agonising silence between us. "I love you too, Rosie. I always have."