Alpha & Beta (BxB)

Chapter 9

"Carter," I said in a hushed voice. "Carter... Carter, are you okay?" Carter looks over at me, coming out of his thoughts. "Carter, are you okay?" I ask again. He takes a second, breathes deep, then slowly shakes his head no. My chest feels tight, guilt bubbled inside my stomach. I should have stopped kissing him, he is probably doubting me as a mate. God, I feel like such a disappointment.

But before I could think another negative thought, I felt Carter's lips on mine. A small peck like the last kiss but this time my wolf didn't push for more. The warmth of his lips spread from mine to the rest of my body, like a heated blanket. Carter rest his forehead to mine, and I let out a sign.

We just relaxed for a second, our heads leaning together, my eyes closed.

"I didn't want to stop kissing you," Carter spoke to me quietly. I open my eyes to meet his blue ones staring back at me. "You have no idea how bad I wanted to keep going." If only he knew how bad I wanted it also. "But..." He looks away for my eyes. "If I mate you or even claim you, everyone would know." My throat tightens, he doesn't want anyone to know. He must of saw the hurt in my face, because he told my hand into him. Sparks spread from my fingertips to the top of my arm, all the way to my chest. "I want to tell people," he says quietly, "my wolf wants me to claim you in from of everyone." He looks up to my eyes, lust in his, then slowly studies my face as if he wanted to remember every detail. "But I also need to be a good alpha, and I don't know how people would react to me being...." he trailed off at the end of his sentence, looking away from my face out to the lake. I didn't know if I should make him say it, to say he was gay, so I just sat there, holding his hand, not saying anything.

"I want to apply for the A.B.S program." I say after a moment of silence. "I was talking about it with my alpha today." Carter didn't respond, he just kept looking the lake.

"Half of me wants you to do the program." He says in a hushed voice, still looking at the lake. "I know it will make my wolf happy and I'd like to be able to smell you more often." He chuckles and a stupid smile spreads across my face. "But the other half of me," He turns to look at me, distress now in his face. "The reasonable half of me, says that you shouldn't go. I would be too distracted by your presents to focus on anything. The sound of your footstep, the smell of your body would just keep me from focusing on my alpha duties." My heart aches with every word he says. "And then their is my parents."

"What about your parents?" I say in a whisper. He takes a deep breath, and turns back to the body of water in front of us. He started to rub the back of my hand with his thumb.

"Their not exactly going to let me mate a male. The alpha bloodline has to continue. They are also very narrow minded." His words had strong emotions in them; anger, sadness, and a little fear.

"I want to do the A.B.S. program." I said in a firm voice. I look out to the lake, and out the corner of my eye I can see Carter turn and look at me again studying my face. He then lifts our hands of the table and brings them to his lips, kissing my hand lightly. A small smile appears on my lips, but I continue to look at the lake in front of me. Carter then scoots closer, his thigh and sides are completely pressed up against mine. I continued to watch the water. He slowly brought his lips to my neck and plants a kiss. A shiver raced through my body and my eyes fall shut.  He dragged his lips from the bottom of my neck to my jaw line, pausing at my jawline to plant another wet kiss.

My eyes were close, my heart beating fast, and my body felt hot. He brought his hand to my face, and turns my head slowly toward him. My eyes fluttering open from his action.

"I want you to do the A.B.S. program." His voice is confident and sure. A large grin is now plastered on my face. He leans in and kisses me, my whole body fells like it's on fire and sparks are exploding throughout my lips. I bring my hand and run it through his hair, grabbing at the roots.

He slowly pulls away, both of us gasping for air. We lean our heads together, foreheads touching. All I could hear was the sound of us breathing and the water of the lake.