Ruby Red

XIV

       

This is the worst hangover I've ever had, and it's not even due to the 4 cans of beer I consumed last night. I slowly open my eyes to pull myself out of the painful sleepy haze. The lack of windows makes it hard to tell if it's light or dark outside. Judging by my environment, I could've been asleep for 10 minutes or 10 hours. I use my elbows to push myself upright, and that's when I see Ken in one of the lounge chairs, in a deep sleep.

Images from last night flood my mind, and I quickly look away. He kissed me. I didn't kiss him. He kissed me. Don't be embarrassed. Trying to calm myself down mentally, I slowly sit up. A fleece blanket which I don't remember grabbing rolls off my shoulders. I'm on... his bed. Again, I glance at him. It must be so uncomfortable to sleep on a lounge chair. I feel bad. I climb onto my feet, and reach out to lift the long piece of cardboard in front of the narrow windows. The view isn't anything special, it's just the creepy alley. But it's daytime now. Not so creepy anymore. Ken clears his throat in an attempt to grab my attention.

I jump away from the window, and quickly get off his bed. I look at him. He looks at me. He rolls his neck, and rubs the back of it. I stare at him in anticipation, but he gets up in silence, and walks straight into the bathroom. I choke back a sarcastic remark but the door shuts before I can say it. The sound of dripping water soon turns into a strong shower stream. Alone time for him, and me.

After a few minutes the bathroom goes silent. The door opens, and Ken walks out in a new outfit, drying his wet hair with a small towel. He looks in the opposite direction, still avoiding me. I sigh and push myself past him, into the bathroom. With a loud click, the door closes behind me. The space is small, but it has everything a person needs. A shower, a sink, a closet. Hm. I open the closet doors. Amidst all the dark clothing, there's a green plastic bag. My clothes. How thoughtful of him. I roll my eyes and close the closet doors, turning around to prepare the shower.

About fifteen minutes go by, and I finally walk out of the bathroom. Risky it was, but I chose to wear one of Ken's black shirts to go with my jeans. All of my other clothes are dirty or still damp from the rain. He notices the shirt immediately, but it doesn't seem to bother him. Too much. He inhales, and finally speaks."I'm going to get food." he states, ruffling his damp hair with his hand.

So he's just going to pretend nothing happened last night. Alright. Two can play that game.

"Sure." I say, turning my back to him. I run my finger along the book covers on the shelves, pretending to look for something to read. As I do so, I notice the glow in my ring. Is it... even more red now? Ken clears his throat for the second time this morning.

"About last night." he says.

So he does remember. I slowly turn around to face him. His arms are crossed over his chest, making his biceps more visible. I almost give an audible gulp.

"I uh... well I think it's safe to say we were both... drunk." he continues, hints of nervousness in his voice. "If it weren't for the alcohol I wouldn't have... you know. So I'm sorry." Ouch. I lower my head, looking at my feet. I hadn't exactly sketched a worse case scenario beforehand, but if I had, it would be this. His words don't just sting, they bring up anger too. Anger that makes me want to be brutally honest. And so I am. I lift my head again and look at him with determination. "I don't regret it."

The familiar widening of his eyes makes me want to laugh, but I manage to maintain a serious expression. His lips part slightly as if he wants to say something, but can't. My eyes shift to the sunglasses on the table. I grab them, and hold them out to him. "I'm hungry. Let's go." I say, scanning his facial expression for a brief moment. It's somewhere between surprised and admiration. I grab my coat from the lounge chair and put it on as I walk up the stairs. In my mind I'm conflicted between giving myself a shoulder pat and scolding myself. This sudden confidence is so unlike me, but it feels good. Different. Better. Unsure if my boldness has persuaded him to come along, I open the door.

I hear footsteps approaching behind me, and a smile creeps onto my lips.