it's not easy to act natural
when I'm done and wants to get away
far from this pain and from this familiar strangers
I've tried, tried for million times
to be fine and bear todays
but its hard and I became weak
whenever I tried to fight
cause I'm fighting with my own demon
and im trying so hard to kill her
but she loves me the way I loved him
she says to hug her and sleep for forever
she says to bleed and break walls by knuckles
honestly, I want that too
I crave pain too
because it's bearable than his poisonous memories
I want to go away
far from this happy hell
I don't want to be an actor
cause I'm not the one
I never was
I'm me
broken
healed
and again
shattering.
****************
old one
