Bullied Love ~ Melix

The Fear [CH8]

                               ~~~~~~~~~~~~~Marzia~~~~~~~~~~~~~

So..

That just happened. 

 I honestly can't say how long it has been since the little meeting with Felix. I was physically incapable to move, like in a total lockout mode. The quiet clock on the wall that usually ticks in this store was nowhere to be heard - in my ears at least. My vision to surroundings became misty slowly, like I was in another world. I could barely feel the little grocery basket in my hands, in fact I wasn't sure if I felt my feet either. Sinking feeling became even deeper for me at this point. I felt like I could melt right through the wooden floor. I felt like I was drowning, but I could still breath. In this world I was in peace, almost. I lost total track of my physical body, my soul was in this empty yet filling environment. No noise, nothing to hear - Just quiet.

 But then the reality came back when something dropped to the floor. It wasn't really that heavy nor light. Still that sound echoed in my brains while my eyes started to get used to this world. Finally after what felt like eternity I started to feel my feet and hands again starting from toes. I almost dropped my basket too.

''Fuck!'' I heard someone curse.

 Actually now that I think about it, not just someone - Felix.

 I felt my pupils growing bigger and bigger. I swear I forgot to breath for a moment. After spending a brief moment in my imagination world this reality hit me hard. I wanted to take at least a step somewhere but my feet were nailed to the floor. So instead of taking a step anywhere I rose my trembling free hand and took some leaning from the shelf next to me. 

 After a brief moment trying to calm myself at least a little I started to listen. I wanted.. No. I needed to know where exactly he was. If I knew myself at least a little I know I am totally incapable of leaving anywhere unless I know he's not around. I can't properly explain this or put this into words, but I would much rather see him anywhere else but here. Oh God not here - at least after this day.

''Are you okay ms. Bisognin?'' Celia asks.

 I jumped a little, moving something from the shelf. A small box far falling almost to the floor but I managed to catch it right before it fell.

''Y-yeah, I am. Just a little tired'' I cackled, turning my head to show a crooked smile.

 I felt my cheeks burning so hot you could cook something on them. I was so embarrassed. How is it possible to overreact like this to basically harmless situation? I mean yeah, we did share a couple sentences between each other but that was it. There was nothing, nothing that special.

 That was the moment when I heard a light snicker right behind the shelf I was leaning onto. I held my breath for a moment just so I could process that literally Felix was all this time just a couple meters away from me while I'm practically having a mild anxiety attack. What was he even laughing about? Maybe me? Or at least that little chuckle he gave happened right after I almost dropped something. Why does his mischievous laughter sound so good too?

 While collecting my little courage that I might have left in me I started to wonder, why hasn't Felix moved anywhere else yet? I mean, there has been so much time and even I know that. This is a small store and on that shelf he's in has only dry food. Is he waiting for me to do something else very awkward? I mean yeah that's totally possible.

 Finally what felt like another century yet again I forced myself to move to Celia. I knew I was in no condition to continue my shopping. So I'd just buy this shall pack of tea instead of all the things I really do need into the apartment. But right now I choose my mental health over that.