Robin and Wayne Kid One-Shots

Random Crap

I told you some stuff on here would be like twenty words. But I put a bunch of them together anyway so you would be happy.

A couple of them are variants of the same idea.

Since they're incomplete, you can use an idea or two, but try to give credit where credit is due.

xXx

(Before a patrol)

Dick: Just don't get killed.

*everyone looks at Jason*

Jason: Been there, done that. Just don't sass the devil when you get there. Makes resurrection that much harder.

Tim: *looks at Dick* Is he serious?

Dick: *shrugs*

xXx

(Dick talking to Tim early in his time as son of Bruce)

Dick: When people come to kidnap you, don't make it obvious that you're an amazing fighter or whatever. Run or be a MacGyver or whatever, but don't make it easy for people to connect the dots.

Tim: Don't you mean 'if' people try to kidnap me?

Dick: You're a Wayne. We're filthy rich in a crime-ridden city. There's no 'if' about it.

xXx

Secret society: JOIN US!

Dick: No.

Secret society: Your family will die.

Dick: When do I start?

xXx

Fangirls: *fangirling over Dick* Join us! Rule the world alongside us!

Dick: Seriously? You guys too?

Noob fangirls: ?

Seasoned fangirls: *understanding that every secret society and villainous organization tried to recruit him* No, we want to worship you, not have you do our bidding. We won't even threaten your family. Unlike those heathens.

xXx

This is more like headcanon.

The entire Batfam is incredibly passive-aggressive. Tim got mad at Dick and Jason, so he changed the wifi password. For their revenge, Dick and Jason, whenever they passed a picture in the manor, tilted it to the side. This went on for a week. Tim tried to hide it, but on the sixth day, they found him manically running around to every picture in the entire mansion (not an easy feat) and fixing it.

xXx

Jason: Hey dude! You've got it too!

Percy: What?

Jason: *points to white streak in his own hair*  *points to the gray in Percy's*

Percy: OMIGOSH THAT'S SO COOL!

Annabeth: Hey Percy, who's that?

Jason: SHE HAS IT TOO?!

xXx

Dick: *finishes watching Percy Jackson movies*

*loud crash*

Alfred: *runs in* Master Dick, whatever happened to the television?

Dick: Sorry, I was playing Wii bowling and--

Alfred: That is the television remote.

xXx

Wally: *to a once-friendly person* You're like vanilla extract. You smell good, but you taste terrible.

Dick: *facepalms* That would've been an excellent analogy had you not phrased it so poorly.

xXx

For some reason, Robin decides to hang out with the Joker. They get along really well after a rough start, and Dick helps the Joker plan his next escapade. It's an elaborate trap that has Batman following a trail straight to--

Joker: A bomb!

Robin: Nope.

Joker: A tank full of piranhas!

Robin: Nothing.

Joker: What?

Robin: Nothing happens! You'll get your fun, and Batman will read way too far into it for weeks. You'll get into his head!

xXx

Aaaand that's all the time we have for today, folks! Tune in eventually, some Bat-Time, same Bat-Channel!