b l u r r y - yugkook

다섯.

jungkook.

He felt really guilty. The look of hopelessness in the others eyes when Jungkook told him that he didn't know what happened that night was almost unbearable. He hadn't had time to psych himself up into the cocky Jungkook that he had always pretended to be, so when he was asked a certain question by a certain male, he was a little more shook than he should have been. He had answered with a lie, by saying no, and now he regretted it, he should've just told the truth and got it out of the way, so there were no further problems, but now, he has to cover up his lie with more lies, and just hope that Yugyeom doesn't find out, though, if he was in Yugyeom's shoes, he would probably feel like shit, and thinking about how the taller must feel didn't exactly help Jungkook's mood.

All in all, the feeling of dread in the pit of Jungkook's stomach was almost suffocating, at this point, and he was questioning why he couldn't do just one thing right and confess to the taller that he did in fact know what had happened that night, he told himself that he would tell yugyeom sooner or later, as the look of despair on the taller's face when Jungkook told him that he didn't know what happened was crushing to remember.

As he walked to his next class, feeling almost nauseous, the bad thoughts slowly seeping in, he realized that he needed to get to the nearest bathroom fast, before anyone noticed that he wasn't his "usual" cocky self. He needed to realize that there was nothing he could do about the situation now, and he needed to slap a smile on his face and become the "School Jungkook" that everyone knew and loved, so that people wouldn't ask questions. Honestly, if it was up to him, he wouldn't even waste the effort and time of putting in a fake attitudes but, because he used to be so happy as a kid, that's how people expect him to be, so that's how he is. He does it all for the other people, so people don't worry, so they don't ask questions. None of it is for him. He hates it, because he knows that everyone he's ever dated and all of his friends—with the exception of Jimin of course—are all friends with the fake him, the act him, not the real him. And he doesn't blame them, Jungkook wouldn't want to be friends with the real Jungkook either. He's just a sad mess, it's a surprise to him that Jimin had stayed around this long in the first place.

He finally manages to paste his smile back onto his face, and makes it just in time for his next class, which thankfully, he doesn't share with Jimin. This is good for the sole reason being that Jimin would be able to tell that something was wrong, and ask him about it, which is not a conversation Jungkook felt like having at the moment.

He slid into his desk at the back of the room, next to his friend (more like acquaintance) Jinyoung, who gave him a smile which he expertly returned, and then proceeded to pull out his papers in preparation to take notes on the lecture that was going to take place in the front of the room. As the lecture began, he paid close attention, drowning out the distractions around him, making sure he had everything he needed written down. Despite his seemingly cocky attitude, he tried his best to do well in school, as he knew that he had to in order to have any kind of future. So he tried his best, amongst his other problems, and he was smart so it came pretty easily to him. His grades though, were a main part of his stress, and sometimes, it would get the best of him, and completely break him down when no one was watching.

As the lecture began to wrap up, Jungkook collected his multiple pages of notes, and walked out of the classroom, finding Jimin at his next class, and continued the rest of the day as he usually would, ignoring his almost break down prior that morning.

He managed to go through the rest of the day without too much of a problem, shoving the bad thoughts, thoughts of Yugyeom, and thoughts of the night before, deep down whenever they arose. He made it back to his dorm room, crashed onto his bed, and fell asleep before Jimin got back with the take-out that they were supposed to have for dinner that night. He was out cold before he could even begin to worry about Yugyeom and what the following day would have in store for him, falling asleep before even taking off his shoes.

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Word Count: 815.