Don't Leave

Chapter 49

       Two weeks later...

                     Nick's POV
 
   "I don't think I'll be able to work at SVU again." She said.
   We were laying on the sofa like every other night.
   "You don't need to make that decision yet." I told her.
   She held my arm tighter and started crying. This was it, she had to tell me everything she'd been hiding all this time.
   "I thought Jeff was bad, but Caleb was far worse. He didn't care if I lived or died."
   A lot of what she told me was so brutal I could barely comprehend it.
   "You know about the broom?" She was sobbing. "He did it more than once"
   Closed her eyes imagining, remembering something. She cried more.
   "I'm so sorry. He's gone, he can't hurt you" I held her tighter.
   She was choking on tears as she spoke.
   "In the woods, he did it with a tree branch, before you came."
   I was now crying. Then she said something that just broke me.
   "Why does everyone have to hurt me?"
   "No one will, not anymore I swear on my life."
   She looked up at me.
   "Why do you care about me?" She asked.
   "Because I love you"
   I finally said it. She cuddled back into my chest.
   "I love you too." She said as a tear rolled down her face.

  
   It had been raining and snowing since Thursday nonstop. Sunday morning I woke up to the smell of pancakes and eggs. I walked into the kitchen and could tell she had been crying. Last night must've still be bugging her.

     Flashback
   The clock read 2:45 when I woke up to muttering coming from somewhere in the room along with Apollo whining. I looked around and spotted Amanda sitting on the floor right outside the bedroom. I got Apollo out of the way and attempted to understand what she was muttering.
   "why are you doing this? You said you loved me." Was all I could make.
   She screamed.
   "I'm sorry!" She yelled "I'm sorry nick" I heard my name and fell to my knees beside her.
   "Amanda wake up" I said gently.
   She stopped talking and moving for a second, I assumed it was over. Then her breathing grew rapid. She didn't move any limbs but she was turning her hair side to side saying "no" Finally she slammed her head into the wall, hard, creating a hole in it. This woke her up. I saw her head was bleeding, but when I tried to feel where the blood was coming from she jerked away.
   "Why did you do that?" Was all she said.
 
  End of flashback

   The dream had been about me, I know that much.
   "I made breakfast." she said as I walked in.
   I opened my mouth to speak, but instead she did.
   "The eggs, they're burned, I'll make more" she began scrapping them into the trash.
   "You don't need to do that"
   She ignored me and continued on. I looked at a piece of paper on the counter. It was a to-do list.
   Make breakfast
  Dishes
  Do laundry
  Whatever
  Make lunch
  Dishes
  Clean
  Laundry
  Whatever
  Make dinner
  Dishes
  Sleep
   "What's this?" I asked genuinely curious
   "Nothing" she quickly said.
   "Do you want to talk about your dreams last night?"
   "What dream?"
   "You don't remember?"
   "I remember you...no I mean I fell asleep, early."
   No she didn't. She fell asleep at 2 in the morning. What was she hiding?

          Amanda's POV

   What did I remember? I remember falling asleep my head in his lap watching tv as usual. I remember waking up same place I fell asleep. I don't remember details, but I remember being thrown against a wall and asking why he did that.
   Could it have been a dream? I asked myself that several times, I remember pinching myself to wake up, but never did. Maybe he was just like every other guy in my life. Maybe Jeff was right, maybe I did deserve this.
   "Amanda?" I suddenly snapped back to reality.
   "Yeah?"
   "You alright?"
   I nodded.
   "Look, you're supposed to be a guest here. I don't want you stressing over breakfast and dirty laundry"
   "Okay" was all I said
   "Alright. Now I have to go meet Fin about something. I'll be back soon."

         Nick's POV

   I met Fin outside the prison where Jeff is being kept.
   "I can't believe they're going to let him go" I said
   "There's no way in hell Barba coreced a confession. Jeff's got ties somewhere, the question is where?"

   "Look who's back" Jeff came in with a grin on his face.
   "We're not here to play games, tell us who you're paying off." Fin said.
   The guards left knowing how this will probably end. He laughed then sat down.
   "Why would I tell you?"
   "So I don't break your fucking neck"
   You go Fin I thought to myself.
   "And loose your job? All that for what? A lying whore?"
   "Don't talk about her." I said.
   "Why? You know I'm right. You both know how she slept with her boss in Atlanta to get ahead. How many times has she lied and said she stopped gambling?"
   "Shut your mouth"
   He stared into my eyes.
   "You better be keeping a tight leash on her, show her who's in charge."
   I couldn't stand it anymore. I reached over the table punching him in the nose. He fell back off the chair sat up and wiped the blood from his nose.
   "Come on, tell me you never just at least wanted to fucking deck her."
   "Shut up, I'm not you you coward."
   "How bout you?" He looked at Fin
   "Partners for how many years and you never wanted a piece of that fine body?"
   That was it. Fin grabbed him by the collar and pushed him against the wall.
   "You really don't know when to shut up do you?"