i kissed you one last time before leaving for the senior picnic.
if i had known it was the last time, i would have made it last longer.
graduation came, and i cried. this time, i cried in your arms, and this time i didn't hold back like i did in year 10. i had gotten accepted to the school of my dreams, you had extinguished that crazy vietnam idea, but now you were texas-bound, so i knew i wouldn't see you again. i hugged you. not like the other times we huddled in together for selfies, not like the other times we did it with laughter and mirth, not like those hugs after a fight. i hugged you with all my energy, because that was it. three years of smiles, tears, fights, deep conversations, kisses, touches, complaints, adventures... it was all over.
my lipstick was all over the collar of your shirt and your neck. it was Desiree's favourite shirt on you, so i'm glad the stains took a while to remove. you removed my grad cap and kissed my hair while my lips were pressed against your clavicle, and i wished desperately that we were alone and not surrounded by teachers and students so i could just tiptoe and kiss you one last time, as toxic as that was. your eyes were teary.
mine were hidden behind sunglasses but i've always been an easy crier.
you slipped my graduation cap back on and we took one last photo together.
