Cuddle Application

18 - Questioning Sexy Bois Everywhere

"Heaven is comfort, but it's still not living."
~Alice Sebold

➳♀♁➳

A chill crawls up my spine despite the warm weather outside. Park stands in front of me, eyes wide and upset.

Oliver's lying to you.

He runs a quick hand through his blond hair and looks at me expectedly, but the words he's said run on repeat in my brain, preventing me from coming up with my own.

"What?" I finally manage, my voice coming out as a whisper. I don't even fully understand what he's said - my relationship with Oliver is fake? We barely had a relationship; we'd known each other for a few short weeks and gone on a single date.

My chest flutters slightly at the thought of it. The carnival, the rides, the almost-kiss. Neck. I suddenly remember his old friend Neck who showed up out of the blue, and how Oliver refused to tell me about him. I still had no answers about that one.

"There's quite a few things you don't know about me," Oliver had said that day. Could Park be right - was Oliver lying to me?

But lying about what? Liking me? Who he was?

I make a mental note to ask again about Neck, though Oliver's past might not be my biggest problem right now.

"Skylar," Park starts, and I realize I've been looking at the ground. I raise my eyes to meet his and he looks pained. "I don't know how to tell you this." He bites his bottom lip and my attention is drawn there. I can't stop comparing him to Oliver. I wish I could look at them independently, compare them unbiasely, but I can't.

"Just tell me," I say. Goosebumps are appearing on my arms and I wrap them around my body. Muted screams of laughter can be heard from beyond the garage, but nothing about this night feels like a party.

Park sighs. "I overheard a conversation between Oliver and one of his friends earlier-"

"Oliver's friends?" I interrupt. "They're here?"

Could it be Neck? Or some of Oliver's other friends? It strikes me that I haven't met anyone he considers a friend, except my own brother. I don't know much of his school life at Helaci, or how his sports seasons went.

I have a craving to know Oliver that's as tangible as the desire to eat, which surprises me. I've never liked someone this much before.

Park stops talking, and I realize I haven't been listening. Following his stare, I realize he's looking at something on my neck. My hand flies to the spot, instinctively.

"Is that a hickey?" he asks softly. My breath hitches in my chest, heartbeat slowing. Park's face falls, realizing. "Did you - did you kiss him?"

My mouth closes, and an eery silence fills the room. I don't know what to say, but the hurt sliding across Park's face is enough to break my heart.

My silence confirms Park's question, and he turns away from me, shaking his head. My stomach feels like it's full of lead.

My mouth opens, closes, opens again. "Park."

"You kissed him." His voice sounds far away. I wish he would look at me. I wish this entire conversation had never happened. "Was this before or after I kissed you?"