Covet {Yuumika/Mikayuu}

Kind but Hurtful

René and Lacus watch Mikaela fall in love. It as magical, as it is heart-wrenching.

It is magical because it lights a fire in Mikaela. Makes him smile, laugh, and sing, and twirl because he's brimming with excitement. It is heart-wrenching because Mikaela is no longer the child they can all rush to pull back and shelter. Because love is kind but hurtful.

They watch when Mikaela comes home after meeting with the man who once-stole-a-kiss again. There was no kiss this time. Told to them by Mikaela as he sat and kicked his feet in excitement and placed his fingertips to his lips. It is meant to be a teasing joke when he says, "Because he is a gentleman we did not kiss." Both René and Lacus know the glint in Mikaela's eyes is childish resentment. He wanted a second kiss. Quite possible a third. And then a million more. All because love is addictive.

René and Lacus speak in hushed whispers that night.

They're in René's bed, they haven't shared a bed in years—not that it was ever a common thing—but that hardly matters now in their whispered interchange of words.

"I don't like it." Lacus hisses and he does not bother to scold his features. He lets his mouth wrinkle into a scowl and lets his eyebrows pinch together.

René would find this amusing, knowing why Lacus dislikes it so much, but he himself does not like it. It is not out of the same jealousy Lacus harbors. It is of a parental jealousy; one which he knows is childish to believe no one deserves the child he so carefully and meticulously raised. Another part of him whispers it's because it will end in ruin.

They did not kiss but Mikaela still walked and as he did, he left behind his rosey scent and one that was as unfamiliar as it was undeniably human.

Staring at Lacus' displeased face, he calls his eyes when he quietly admits, "I don't either."

They share a bed that night. A silent comfort. Their world is shifting into something new. It is uncomfortable and jarring. But they will not stop the change. As servants they know their place is to quietly watch and adapt faster than their masters. To accommodate them through the change. They swallow their bitter resentment and find no sleep.

Mikaela does not meet the man who makes his heart flutter for six weeks. And within those six weeks René and Lacus watch Mikaela impatiently wait for arriving letters. It means he acted without thinking and handed out his address. The scold that René gives him flies over his head, but it does make a small dose of guilt fall upon his impatient frame.

Within those days Lacus confesses his guilt to feeling relief when Mikaela deflates at the lack of a coveted letter. René does scold him them.

"The feelings you harbor are prohibited," he says and it stings to watch Lacus recoil, "but so are his. I've let you both do as you please," he looks away from Lacus but still catches the way Lacus stiffens when he finishes, "the Master will not be pleased."

It goes unsaid that neither of them will be the one to tell. But it is a warning. If the Master notices, they won't be left unscathed.

It is into the fourth week that Mikaela receives his awaited letter. It starts off with an apology. Mikaela reads some of it out loud:

"—I've turned my brain to mush trying to figure out what say for so long that I hadn't even noticed the weeks go by. Not that I haven't been counting the days since we last met. But time goes by so fast and so slow when I try to write to you. When I think of you.
      It's embarrassing to admit but I wanted to write you something romantic. I think you would like that. It's a shame I'm better with actions that with words. Because of that I have a pile of failed letters.
When we meet again, I wonder if you'd let me hold your hand. Maybe this time I could kiss your cheek and you could gift me one in return—"