Discovering Rowan [on hold]

Chapter 9

Chapter 9

I looked up at him though watery eyes my voice now no more than a whisper.

"How?" I blinked and tears ran down my face. "How have you ever loved me? All those times on the bus you made me feel like crap." I let out a long shaky breath. Skylar put his arms round me. I wanted to do the same to him but I didn't.

"Rowan," He murmured into my hair, "Eric gave me a choice when I joined Latham Primary in year 4. He would make my life hell or I could be his friend. I chose the friend option. Ever since I made that choice I regretted it but it isn't easy to get out of his circle of friends. I would throw the occasional insult to keep them happy, but it's tiring. That's why I stay away from them at school. In year 7 I used to hang out with them for a week or two but then I stopped and went to the music block. It was kind of my escape. I was sick of what they were doing to you. Somehow, that night I found you in the dark, he knew I was with you because the next day, before you got on, he kicked me until I told him what happened. Every time they hurt you I felt so bad. It was my fault, I didn't want you hurt but," His voice was a whisper now, "Eric knew towards the end of year 7 when I watched you play after school one day, he knew I liked you, that I had feelings for you. And that's when he started hurting you. And I had no choice but to do it too." I didn't know what to feel. I didn't know what to think. My brain was still processing everything he had told me.

"Skylar" Was all I could choke out. He wrapped his arms round me and this time I didn't resist, I wrapped my arms around him and snuggled into his chest. We stood there for a few minutes. I was the one to break the hug. "It's getting dark" I whispered. He looked upwards.

"I know. It's okay. You've got me." But had I? All he had just told me, was it true? Or was it just an excuse to make me forgive him? As we were soulfinders we had no choice but to stay together. But if he was lying I wasn't prepared to stay with him and I wasn't going to forgive him just yet.

"I think I need to get home." I looked down at my converse.

"Okay." We walked home my hand in his. It felt so good being with him and when I had to say goodbye I felt empty. When he left me I felt like he had walked away with a part of me. I missed him already.

When I got inside I had a long hot shower to try and wash away my anxiety. I honestly didn't know what to think. That day when I ran to him in the dark, he didn't know I was his soulfinder then, yet he still seemed to care. It was so confusing. But I wanted to be with him so badly. I didn't feel at home here anymore. Ever since Tanya joined me and Luke, I was no longer his top priority, his soulfinder had taken that place. I supposed I was lucky that my soulfinder lived so close to me. Some soulfinders didn't even understand the same language.

Afterwards I sat down with Luke Tanya Zoe and Zed and had pasta. Luke asked me why I seemed down but I passed it off by saying I was tired and headed up to bed once again.

I lie down on my bed in my black Of Mice and Men t shirt and my favourite black skinny jeans listening to Kerrang Radio. It felt good to prop my legs up after a day of walking around on just one leg which made my foot ache. I hoped my foot would heal soon. Urgh. Everything was a mess. Dog came up and made himself comfortable on my bed. I turned my phone off and fell asleep to the sound of him purring.

"I came back." Luke is at the door and someone is outside. The voice is like fathers.

I always have this dream.

"No. You abandoned us."

"No Luke! Don't close the door on him!" I run downstairs to try and stop Luke before it is too late.

But this time the dream is different.

Standing at the door is Skylar.