anxiety.

seven.

"maybe your light is a seed and the darkness the dirt. in spite of the uneven odds, beauty lifts from the earth."

scarlett.

i reached out to feel around me with my eyes still closed as i let out an inaudible groan. my hand touches a soft blanket and moves up to a couple of pillows and around to mason's chest.

WAIT... MASON'S CHEST?

my eyes blink open and i spring up immediately, earning a light laugh from mason. my heart starts racing, did i fall asleep here? my cheeks are instantly filled with red heat. not only did i fall asleep here, on mason's bed in mason's room in mason's house, but i fell asleep on top of mason. i start gathering up my things, "oh my gosh i'm so sorry to have fallen asleep on you. i didn't even realize how tired i became from talking. this really was my mistake." i ramble out.

mason gently takes the things i'm holding out of my hand and rests them on top of his bed. my eyes lock with his. "hey hey it's okay. i figured you needed the rest." he reassures me and lets go of my wrists. i check the time on my phone and it's already past eight. time flies past extremely quick when i'm with him.

"i-i should really be getting h-home. it's late and my p-parents are probably worried." i grab the remainder of my things and run out of his house....

...until i realized that he drove me here. my car is at my house. it was either have him take me home or call my parents to pick me up. this would not go well with my father. i hear the front door shut behind me and i jump.

"need a ride, huh?" mason smirks. i nod my head, opening the door to his car as we both hop in. i give him my address and we take off.

"feeling any better?" he asks. he's so kind, i can't believe he cares so much. even for him to ask means so much to me. and to answer his question, i did and i didn't even realize i did. i woke up feeling better rested and less anxious.

"i actually do." i see mason give the tiniest smile from the corner of my eye. "thanks to you." i add sheepishly, knowing my face was already red. i gave off the littlest smile myself, knowing i had something good going with him.
i watched the lit up houses pass by and i was perfectly happy to do so.

"listen.." mason starts. " i know that we haven't been too close for a long time, but i'm here for you scarlett. if you're sad or if you're anxious or if you can't fall asleep or if you ever just need someone to talk to, you can come to me. i don't care if it's in the middle of class or if its early in the morning... the point is i'm here always, anytime of day. everything is gonna be okay and its gonna stay that way as long as i'm around. that's a promise. and i don't break my promises."

i was speechless. i didn't know where that came  from but no one has ever said something like that to me before. for the first time in a long time, it felt like somebody cared about me. after crying about no one listening to me for so long, i have somebody that i felt comfortable talking to about anything, including my anxiety. i had been drowning for so long, i forgot what oxygen had felt like. in that moment i realized that's what mason was, he was a breath of fresh air. he made me feel so loved.

"m-mason" i breathed out, watching my house come up in the near distance. he stopped in the driveway and his eyes met mine. he leaned in and i leaned in and suddenly our lips were touching. we were kissing for a mere three seconds before i pulled back with a gasp realizing what i had done. i slammed shut the door of his car before he could say anything else and i ran into my house and up to my room.

i quickly closed my door behind me leaning my back against it. i was panting hard and fast. what did i just do? how could i be so stupid? he does not like me like that. i possibly could have just ruined anything going on between us. i started to cry. of course i would ruin the first good thing to happen to be in a while. i couldn't do anything right. my phone buzzed in my pocket and i pulled it out.