Growing up McGarrett

Words

After a while there is a knock on the restroom door. "Go away!" I say. "It's Dad" the disembodied voice replies. "Go AWAY!" I shout. I can tell he's rubbing his face with his hand, trying to calm his frustrations and decide what to do. Then I hear him walk away. Alone again, I wonder what I'm going to do next. I can't stay in here forever but I really don't want to have to talk to Dad, or anyone, about this right now. I think if I start I'll never stop and it will be ugly. Then I'll end up in trouble again. So nope I've gotta find a way to stay in control and quiet.
Eventually I decide it's time to leave the sanctuary of the restroom and go back to the offices. Danny sees me first and asks if I'm ok. "Fine", I reply and continue on into Dad's office with said dad following me like a worried
puppy. Once inside he says in a concerned tone "Sam can we talk about this?". I shoot him a filthy look and say "I want to go home", I pack up my backpack and walk out to the main office without saying anything else. Thankfully Danny is gone somewhere and no one is around to annoy me. I sit and wait for Dad to finish up whatever he was doing. He does it quickly and as soon as I see him coming out of his office I head for the exit. I'm doing everything I can to avoid talking to him and really hope he gets the hint! But of course being a McGarrett he is too stubborn to take hints. He is determined to 'talk' about things. Well I'm equally stubborn if not more so and I don't want to talk! "Can we please talk about this Sam?" He says as he walks beside me. "No"! I reply. "Sam are you ok?" He asks. "Fine!" Is my only response. He sighs and opens the truck's locks as we get to it. I sit into the back seat making it perfectly clear I want to be as far away from him as possible.
The ride home is quietly strained. Of course he's still trying to work out how to solve his problem. He knows this 'problem' will take more finesse than his usual head on style and I can tell it frustrates him. Good! I'm not going to make this easy for him, he certainly hasn't for me. We get to the house and I go straight towards the stairs. "Sam, are you ok?" he asks. "Fine!" I reply for the umpteenth time, just give up already! He sighs in utter frustration, "Fine. Seven fines since we left the office. Can I have another word?" Ok he wants to push then he'll get what he wants. I wanted to just stay quiet and out of trouble but he's like a dog with a bone. So I turn and reply, "Asshole! There's a word!" So much for staying in control and quiet! Well done Sam. "Excuse me?!", he turns towards me, shocked. I give him another dirty look and start towards the stairs again. "Don't you dare walk away from me when I'm speaking to you" he growls. "You mean when you're yelling at me. I'm going to my room!" I snap back. "Take one more step young lady and you will seriously regret it" his tone is back to deathly calm and seething, "I know you are upset about everything that's happened but that does not give you license to speak to me like that. If you have something you want to say to me then we will sit down and talk about it, respectfully". Tears well up in my eyes again. "I don't want to talk to you, now or ever!" I scream at him, "I HATE you!" and with that I run up the stairs to my room not pausing to see his reaction and slamming my door behind me. I flop onto my bed, sobbing. No doubt any second a very angry Commander will burst through the door. But he doesn't. There's no noise of him taking the stairs two at a time, no furious knocking, it's quiet apart from my own sobs. I lie there crying thinking about what I've done and said. I feel awful. Why did I say that? Because you hate him, bratty Sam tells me, but do I really hate him? Does he deserve me being so horrible to him?
A lot of time has passed when I hear heavy footsteps coming slowly up the stairs. There is a gentle quiet knock on my door. "Sam dinner's ready" Dad says, "and please do not tell me you're not hungry". He doesn't wait for an answer, I hear him go back down stairs. He didn't sound angry or even his deathly calm, instead his tone made me feel even worse. He sounded sort of, sad? I slowly go downstairs. I'm not hungry but I know I'll have to eat. I get cutlery from the kitchen and set the table. We sit opposite each other and start to eat. I can't look at him but I can feel him watching me, seeing how much I eat. His hurt and disappointment is palpable but he says nothing. The whole time we are eating it's stoney silence. When he's finished he gets up and says he has work to do. I eat as much as I feel I have to and then go to the kitchen to do the washing up. I head back to go to my room, Dad is bent over paperwork at his desk. He looks up and says "when you're ready to talk, you know where I am", coldly. I stop, I don't look up at him but stare at the ground. I don't know what to say, the two Sams in my head are fighting again, one says tell him to get lost, the other says tell him you don't hate him. Not knowing which will win if I open my mouth, I turn and carry on to my room without saying anything.