the donut dialer [ongoing]

11: ❝you make me laugh the most.❞

❝you make me laugh the most.❞

lorelei┃parker

❁ ❁ ❁

april 17th, 3:59 p.m.
brrring brrring.

✆ call accepted ✆

"spider-man, this is not the best time."

"spider-man? what the..."

"no time to really explain. you're parker, and spider-man is peter parker. well, it made more sense in my head, anyway."

"... i love that nickname, oh my gosh. spider-man is so cool."

"hell yeah, he is."

"DID PEACHES JUST SWEAR?"

"i guess she did... whoops?"

"i'm so glad i was the first to witness that. even though 'hell' isn't really a bad word."

"i agree, it's more of a place called 'school.'"

"i can relate. so much."

"school has been killing me lately with all these finals and prep for SATs and whatever."

"i can tell. you've worn four different types of sweatpants this week and you've been putting your hair in a messy bun because  you're in total work mode."

"you're either totally stalking me, or you're just really observant. yet i don't even know what you look like."

"what? how do you not know what i look like? we go to the same school. lakeview is a pretty small town."

"maybe i have seen you before, but i wouldn't have known it was you. the only reason why i recognized your name when you told me is because i'd heard about you before."

"ooo, tell me what you heard."

"i vaguely remember hearing you asked a girl—was it Georgia or Gianna?—to the winter ball, and then getting rejected publicly. sorry, bro. that's gotta sting."

"i'm going to admit that she did embarrass me in front of the school body, and announced, quote, "i don't date geeks.'"

"sheesh. that's so rude, i wish i knew who she was."

"eh. it's okay. i'm used to it."

"it makes me really sad to hear that, spider-man. you need to be happy. here, lemme put a smile on your face."

* whispers to himself *

"you don't even need to try..."

"knock, knock."

"ha. what is this, fourth grade?"

"knock, knock, ding-dong."

"fine. who's there?"

"honeydew."

"honeydew who?"

"honeydew you know how fine you are right now? 'cuz daaaang."

"eerrrrhhhmagerrrd."

"knock, knock."

"who's there?"

"India."

"India who?"

"what's it going to take for me to get India pants?"

"oh. my. lord."

"knock, knock, bish."

"who's there, bish?"

"Baghdad."

"Baghdad who?"

"are you from Iraq? because i'd love to see you Baghdad a-s-s up."

"i'm crying actual tears."

"hey, i'm not staring at your moobs, i'm staring at your heart!"

"moobs? i am concerned."

"are you a bank loan? because you've got my interest."

"you're so cheesy. i've taught my peaches so well."

"did you just come out of the oven? because you're hot!"

"damn. you're getting good at this."

"you're so hot, if you ate a piece of bread, you would poop toast!"

"okay, okay! i can't breathe!"

"are you cheered up, my good fellow?"

"that made my day 200 times better, thank you very much."

"anytime, mi amigo."

"ha-ha."

"your laugh..."

"what about it?"

"i dunno, it's just so husky and..."

"you like my laugh?"

"it's so cute."

"cute like a puppy-cute, or a manly-cute?"

"a manly-cute, parker. don't worry."

"hmph."

"i don't understand. i sound like a cat in a blender when i laugh, and here you are, laughing so attractively and gracefully. how do you do it?"

"i couldn't have done it without your help. even though i don't get how my laugh is cute, but whatever."

"it just is, okay? your laugh flows freely, and it's contagious. it's really deep and husky..."

"awww. peaches is giving me a compliment."

"pfft. whatever."

"i could say the same for you, ya know. you really should laugh more often, lorelei. i'm afraid i don't hear it that much."

"you make me laugh the most."