Indego

1-Pilot

It's twelve o'clock in the morning. My hair is a knotty mess and my sweater sleeve is wet and streaked with snot. Ewww. I've been staring at my computer screen for hours, watching the numbers rise up and down and up and down again.  

Why I haven't done it yet.? Each jump of a number makes my heart drop into by stomach like I am riding a roller coaster blindfolded. I've been keeping myself from looking at the messages pouring into my inbox. Because I know that I am a few words away from giving up and calling it a night. I can't do that now. I already gave them my answer.

I can't turn back now.

That's it. Take a deep breath and finally move that cursor to the delete button. If I can just press this button, it'll all be over. The humiliation, the pain, the stress would all be over. But if I press it, three years of work of hard work, fans, friends, money, clothes would be gone as well.

No, I can't think about that now. I can't.

I have to remember why I'm doing this, like he told me. What got me to this pitiful state.

Okay I...No, I'm not ready to think about that. I should go a little farther. Ok, It was Ian. It started with my breakup with Ian.

I remember when Wendy told me. I think I was by my locker and about to go to lunch when she was grabbed my shoulders to turn me around.

“Mikayla! Thank God I found you!” she yelled square in my face. I wiped the little spit droplets landed on my face. “Oh! I'm so sorry! But this is super important!”

“Ok?” I told her.

“Alright. First, I need to turn off your Indego,”

I knew then how serious it was. Wendy would never tell me to turn off my Indego. No one ever tells me to turn off my Indego unless it was extremely serious.

Back then, they would need a crane to get my Indego off. I was really hooked on that thing.

So, I held down the little button on the side of my Indego for a few seconds, watched the little screens retreat away from my eyes and then slid off the black band from my forehead.

“Ok. It's off,” I said.

“You sure? You know how hard it is to turn it off. I need to make sure it-”

“Wen! I'm the last person who wouldn't know how to turn it off. But if it makes you feel better, look,” I showed her the unlit band and she nodded calmly.

She slightly shoved me from my locker hole and stuck her pink Indego on top of my text books.

“Are you gonna tell me what this is about?” I asked, but she too was busy straightening out the pink band in a line.

“It's better if I show you. You wouldn't believe it if I told you, but it's about Ian.” She pressed the button on the side of her Indego. A screen of light shot out the band, moving up and across the band like a rising rainbow colored wave.

I always loved that part of the Indego. The strips of light dancing on the band to that cute little start up song always perked me up when I turned it on in the middle of the night. I'm going to miss that when I log off for good.

After the light screen stabilized, she touched the buttons that showed up on the screen and after touching a few buttons, a video showed up on the screen. The video wasn't the best quality since she had the video and sound settings on the basic calibration though I've shown her a hundred times how to make it as clear as my videos, but I clearly saw Ian on the screen and a girl run up and hug him. She looked sad and was saying something to him, but Wendy's freak out in the video covered it.