Red vs Blue Season 1: Male Oc

Rvb S1 E3 "The Rookies"

Red Base
Leo, Simmons and Grif are on top of Red Base. A soldier in red armor (Donut) is walking up the ramp behind them.

Simmons: Hey, that's not exactly what happened.

Leo: Yeah...I have to agree with Simmons on this one.

Grif: You said, "I'm not going to the Vegas quadrant," and then the next thing I know you're in an escape pod headed for-

Donut: Excuse me, uh, sirs.

Grif: Sirs? Ah crap.

Donut: I was told to report to Blood Gulch Outpost Number One and speak to whoever's in charge.

Grif: Sorry man, Sarge is at Command getting orders. Ain't nobody in charge today.

Leo: Actually Grif, Sarge left me in charge while he's gone.

Grif: (Sighs) Of course he did.

Simmons: Yeah and he told me, if I had any trouble from you I should... (clears throat then poorly imitates Sarge) "Git in the Warthog, and crush yer head like a tomato-can."

Leo: That was the worst impression of all time Simmons.

Mother Of Invention
Washington: Achoo!

North: You ok there wash?

Washington: Yeah I'm fine, just feels like something was stolen from me.

Red Base
Leo: Ok rookie what's your name?

Donut: Private Donut reporting for duty, sir. I'm ready to fight some aliens.

Grif: Couple things here, rookie. First off, Private Donut? I think somebody needs a new nickname. Secondly, what's with the armor color?

Donut: This IS the standard issue red.

Grif: Yeah, I know. Listen. Only two kinds of people wear standard issue armor: officers and recruits. And since you're not threatening to gut me like a fish, you're probably not an officer.

Donut: Well, there wearing red armor.

Leo: Um dude my armour is dark red.

Simmons: And my armor is maroon. Your armor is red.

Donut: Well, how do I get a different color armor?

Simmons: I bet the blues don't have to put up with this kind of crap.

Leo: You've probably just jinxed them.

Blue Base
Church, Tucker, and a soldier in standard issue blue (Caboose) are looking at a tank.

Caboose: So I say to the guy, "How're you gonna get the tank down to the planet?" And he goes, "I'll just put it on the ship," and I go, "If you've got a ship that can carry a tank, why not just put guns on the ship and use it instead?"

Tucker: Hey, kid.

Caboose: Yeah?

Tucker: You're ruining the moment. Shut up.

Caboose: Oh. Okay. You got it man!

Church: You know what? I could blow up the whole god damn world with this thing.

Red Base
Simmons: Okay, Private Donut, here's the deal.

Grif: I just refuse to call him Private Donut!

Leo: Then why not call him by his first name then?

Grif: To much work dude.

Simmons: We've got a very important mission for you. You think you can handle it?

Donut: Absolutely!

Simmons: We need you to go to the store, and get two quarts of elbow grease.

Leo: Really Simmons?

Grif: Yeah and uh, pick up some headlight fluid for the Puma too.

Leo: You too Grif?

Donut: The What?

Simmons: He means the Warthog.

Grif: You do know where the store is, right, Rookie?

Donut: What? Yeah, yeah, of course I do. Sure, no problem.

Simmons: Well, get going then.

Donut starts walking the wrong way.

Grif: Other way!

Donut turns around walking the other way.

Donut: I knew that. Just got turned around that's all.

Donut walks away from the group.

Simmons: How long do you think until he figures out there's no store?

Grif: I say... at least a week.

Leo: If he dies I'm blaming it on you two. If you need me I'll be helping Lopez with the warthog.

Simmons: Will tell you if he's dead or alive.

Leo walks away towards Lopez.

Leo: (Talking to himself) Donut might be fine, like what's the worse that could happen to him?

Middle Of BloodGulch
Donut: Elbow grease... How stupid do they think I am? Once I get back to base with that headlight fluid, I'm gonna talk to the Sergeant.

Blue Base
Tucker: You know what? Forget what I said before. We can definitely pick up chicks in this thing. Probably two or three chicks a piece.

Church: Oh man, listen to you. What're you gonna do with two chicks?

Tucker: Church, women are like Voltron: The more you can hook up, the better it gets.

Red Base
Simmons: You think that we were too mean to the kid?

Grif: Nah, he'll just wander around on the cliffs for a few hours. What's the worst that could happen?

Close To Blue Base
Donut: Finally, there it is. ...Oh sweet! They sell tanks!

Red Base Warthog
Leo: Hey Lopez out of 0 to 10 how likely is it for Donut to make it back?

Lopez: (Holds up two fingers)

The End
===============================
Author: YAY! Another one done also I was thinking of making short chapters between episodes for little things that happen so it doesn't feel like your reading a book about rvb huh?