Betrothed To You

Take Me Away

I can't feel my finger tips, my lunges feel as if they have closed up all together, as if none of the oxygen can travel around my body. My poor mamma, they said they would be safe if I left. She said nothing would happen to them now. I lace my finger through my hair and tighten my grip around my ginger locks until my knuckles turn white from pressure. So many thoughts are buzzing around my head that I can't think straight, what are my sister and brother going to do...my brother! "Where is Ekram, is he okay? Is he alive?" I spit out the questions like wild fire, boring into my sisters eyes waiting for an answer immediately, both my eyes flicking between both of hers trying to search for a smidge of something, anything. "He is alive Eva, he is with the survivors of the attack" Em says holding back tears, I know talking about this is hard for her but I need to know everything. I need to make sure I can help them.
I pull my hands out of my hair and straighten my posture, I can not be weak, not yet, not while my sister sits so broken in front of me. I brush the tears out from underneath my eyes and straighten out my skirt. "Take me to them, I want to see mamma" I order, not waiting for a response when I go to grab my coat and shoes, sliding them on effortlessly. "Eva, I don't know if that's a good idea, if Micah Delgrosso even finds out that I came here it could be my head" Emerald rushes out, scurrying behind me tugging on my coat to slow me down when I reach the door. As soon as I hear his full name my head snaps up, of course it was his doing that killed my sweet innocent mother. She would never even hurt a fly, I never understood how she ended up with a man like my father, such a coward it hurt. "Then I really need to go, and I need to tell the Shelby's about this, they can help" I start to mumble all of my thoughts together while I speak, as soon as the Shelby's are mentioned emeralds face pales drastically. Her hands begin to shake and her face looks clammy "we must not tell them, they are dangerous people Evangeline, you can stay with me and Ekram now, we can find a home and live together, you can leave this life behind" Em pleads with me, her hands and wrapped around my arm while she stares into my soul, I can see her eyes watering and her lip quiver. "You need to take me to our camp now Emerald, I have not changed my mind about the oath I made to the Shelby's and neither should you" I say sternly opening the door and letting her walk through. As soon as I say this she looks down to the floor and whispers something under her breath, I don't quite catch it and just ignore her as I get into the car.

The car journey is long and quiet, neither of us talk to each other, I'm in too much shock to try and strike up a conversations and Emerald isn't exactly in the talking mood either at the moment. I forgot how bumpy these roads are, on the way to small heath I remember how focused I was on every bump of the car going over the dirt road, now that day feels like a distant memory, almost as if I dreamt the whole thing up and none of it really happened. The car comes to an abrupt stop, I look outside the window and see all the broken caravans scattered around, people dragging the pieces to make fires, some of them have already been started and people are crowded around them soaking up the warmth that the burning wood provides. I step out of the car and walk over to the crowds of people, my shoes are continuously sinking into the mud resulting in me having to pull out my feet after every other step, it's at these moment I wish we lived in regular streets. I do remember my life here though, I loved it, waking up in the morning and picking fresh fruits to eat for breakfast. Living with such a large group of people, at night a lot of the time me and my friends used to sneak out of the caravans and lay in the middle of the camp on the grass and stare up at the sky, breathing in the fresh air and looking at the stars, we all named one after ourselves and used to see which one of us was the brightest. My friend Mona's was the brightest out of all of us, but I guess it made sense, she was the nicest girl I ever met, she used to raise the horses and keep them healthy. It was what she loved the most, taking care of horses. She was married before I was, not an arranged marriage though. She married her sweetheart and had fallen pregnant just before I left. I wonder what she is up to now? I finally reach the largest fire that is burning at the moment and tap someone on the shoulder. When the person turns around my eyes widen, Mona stand in front of me carrying a newborn baby, it's little hand wrapped around one of her fingers, I hadn't even noticed I was smiling until my cheeks started to ache. I look up at Mona's face to see her eyes are puffy and her face is tear stained. "Where have you been?" She chokes, it didn't sound like a sincere question, more like an order for me to answer, she was filled with venom and I didn't understand why until I realised Brandon was nowhere to be seen. "Micah ruined us, Brandon is gone because he was trying to protect your family, this is all your fault, if your father had just done what he had promised my baby wouldn't be without a father" she screams, pushing me away from her with her free hand. I stumble backwards and fall to the floor when my heel gets caught in the mud again. "Look at you in your pretty dresses with your pretty shoes, you ain't one of us no more" Mona spits, before spinning around and settling her eye site on the fire again. I look over my shoulder at Emerald who is looking down at the floor uncomfortably, she witnessed the whole thing I'm sure. Just as I'm about to ask for her I see a male hand reach out for me over my shoulder, when I look at the owner of the hand I see Thomas standing over me. I smack his hand away and quickly get to my feet. I cross my arms and stare up at him "what are you doing here Thomas? This is family business!" I shout under my breath, not wanting to get everyone's attention that a Shelby is here, wasn't really much point though because everybody was already looking at him. They probably had been since he stepped out of his car. "Your a Shelby now, your business is my business" Thomas says calmly as he looks around at the chaos surrounding us. This place is in ruins, I don't know how people are still living here. I look up at Thomas with pleading eyes, I know he may not want to but we need to take care of these people, they were my people once "Tommy, we need to help them" he looks down at me confused for a second "that's weird, because I'm sure I just saw one of them push you over" Tommy retorts, as he shakes his head. "I'm next in line to take care of them and lead them Thomas, I may not be a callister now but my sister definitely can't do it" I plead, looking into his icy blue eyes for a tiny glint of emotion. He looks down at me and sees the pleading look I am giving him and sighs loudly. "They are under protection from the peaky blinders alright, that's as good as I can do" a bright smile spreads across my face when I hear this and before even thinking about what I'm doing I fling my arms over Tommy's shoulders and squeeze him tightly in a hug, I can feel his body stiffen underneath me and become uncomfortable. Eventually he puts his arms around me and rubs my back soothingly. Poor Thomas, he does try to be nice sometimes. I just wouldn't bet your money on it. I pull away and turn to my sister. "Where are mother and father now?" I ask, taking a step towards her, she looks from me to Thomas, clearly scared of his presence. "They are in the family caravan, being prepared for the funeral later tonight" she rushes, looking anywhere but tom's eyes. I nod politely and make my way over to the most extravagant caravan in sight. The callisters are the highest and most known family here, my father was the one who built this place from nothing and my mother was the one who got people to join us, it's always nice being a friendly face to someone who is struggling and that's what my mother was. As I step inside the caravan is jolts and moves under the pressure of my foot causing me to wobble, before I can even stumble I feel a hand push me lightly so I can hold onto the door handle, I look over me shoulder to see Thomas looking back at me "Your gunna be fine" he reassures me, I haven't seen Tom be comforting before, but it's quite nice, he isn't the big bad wolf like everybody things he is. I hesitate when I get to the bottom of the bed and see my mothers classic brown pumps with her classic blue dress she wore day in and day out, I step closer towards her face, my eyes squinted in case she looks really bad. I don't know how they were killed, they could of been mauled horribly and barely be recognisable. I look down at my mothers face to see a thick purple line across her neck covered in bruising, there is even a thin cut in the middle of it, she wasn't supposed to die like this, a sweet woman like her, she was supposed to die in her sleep when she was old and had lived a full life with family and friends. But she was reduced to this, dying way before her time while she was still so beautiful and still had so much to give to the world. I trace the bruising with my finger as I use my other hand to slowly pull her eyelids down to cover her glassy lifeless eyes. I perch myself on the end of the bed and place my head on her chest searching for some time of heart beat so I know all of this is just some sick joke and those bruises will rub off and be nothing and she will give me and hug and tell me she loves me. But I hear nothing, no sound at all, I don't know why I gave myself false hope knowing that she wouldn't wake up. I guess it's just the dreamer inside me. I look down at her pale skin, paler then it usually is, when I was younger I used to say she was kissed by the moonlight because she was so beautiful and so pale, and she would always tell me that it was passed down to me and Emerald, she couldn't really say it about Ekram, he had a golden tan like my father. I look around the caravan and don't see him anywhere, I swear Em said they were in here together. I shrug it off and look back down at mothers hands, she is wearing my favourite ring of hers that she owned it was a beautiful gold ring with a small ruby in the middle of it with carvings surrounding it all about nature. I slide the ring off her finger and place it on mind so that she will always be close to me. Before bringing her hand up to my lips and kissing her knuckle. "I love you mamma"

As I step out of the caravan I notice Thomas staring at something intently, I follow his gaze to see a flash of red hair. I narrow my eyes to try and get a more precise look into the distance and see Emerald holding...a gun?! I run down the steps and join Thomas at his side. Emerald is holding onto Ekram's hand who is crying and trying to get out of her grip "Em, what are you doing your scaring him!" I shout over the howl of the wind. She looks from me to Ekram and continues to cry "this is all your fault, mother is dead because of you, you never came to visit in those 10 months, not once!" She scream angrily, her hand is shaking as the gun she holds is pointed directly at me. I feel an arm stretch across me, Tommy is now positioned with his arm in front of me for protection "I wouldn't do that if I were you Emerald, she is 2 months pregnant with your niece or nephew" as soon as Thomas says this I look up at him more confused then I have been in my entire life, I can't be two months pregnant I would of noticed by now, it's impossible. I look back up at Emerald who's gun has lowered slightly but as soon as she meets my eyes her stare gardens and she holds the gun back up to me again "our community had fallen apart because you couldn't stick to orders, Micah had me by the throat against the wall, Ekram had to watch his mother get killed and you weren't even here. Your our older sister WHERE WERE YOU!" She screams louder, I can see how much her eyes are glistening from the memories she is reliving in her mind. "I'm sorry" I choke, I don't know how to respond to her, everything she is saying is right, I wasn't there to protect them, I never came to visit like I said I would, I forgot about them, I forgot about my own family because I was too busy living my new life. "Sorry isn't good enough" Emerald clears her throat and aims the gun at my stomach, "Emerald no ple" before I can finish pleading I fly to the floor smack my head on the soil, I can feel my head pulsing from the impact, my stomach is burning. I look down to see a pool of read all over my stomach, my dress is drenched in the crimson blood. My hands fly to my stomach when I feel the pain increase. The blood is joe and thick against the skin on my hands. I hear another gunshot and someone fall to the floor. I can't bring myself to look at who it is, because either way it's going to be someone I care about. "Eva, you need to stay with me alright, you need to keep your eyes open and talk to me" Thomas gulps as he tried to apply pressure to the wound. My eyes feel too heavy, it's as if someone attached tiny weights to them that are pulling them closed. "Come on Evangeline, fuck. Fuck!" It sounds as if Tommy's screaming is miles away my ears are ringing so much. The last thing I remember is being rocked like a child before everything went black.

I peel my eyes open and look at the ceilings it's white and looks freshly cleaned. I look down at my stomach to see there is no red, no injury at all. I hear distant crying of a child, I turn to my right to see John pacing around the room with a bundle of cloth in his arms, that's when I notice the tiny hand he is holding onto, with pale moonlight skin. I sit up in the bed to get a better look causing the bed to creak underneath my weight. John turns round slowly to meet my eyes with a toothy grin. He quickly jogs over to my side and places the baby in my arms "your awake love, you must be exhausted he was a big bugger" John laughs, kissing me lightly on the forehead and crawling into bed next to me. "What's his name?" I ask tiredly, yawning while I try to speak. John looks at me concerned "we named her Emerald Faith Shelby after your mother and sister remember?" John questions. Suddenly I look around the room and it doesn't look so clean anymore, the walls are smeared in blood and my robe is covered aswell, the blood oozing out from my stomach. The baby has disappeared from my arms and John is standing over me "Well, that's what could of happened" he smiles stroking my hair

My eyes shoot open when a wet rag is pressed against my stomach, a soul ripping scream throws itself out of my mouth and I lungs forward trying to pull it away. Tommy looks down at me and sighs "oh thank god your awake" I look over to the floor across from me and see my sister sprawled out on the floor, her limbs laid in an uncomfortable manner, her eyes are still open and staring at me, her head at a weird angle so that her eyes bore into me. Her hair is stuck to the floor from the blood that soaked through it from the bullet hole in her head. My baby sister. It's just now I realise my face is wet from tears after looking at her body. I notice Ekram is being carried away by someone, I don't know who it is, I can only see the back of their head, he is male and ginger but that is all I can uncover. "Ekram!" I try to shout but my body isn't strong enough and it comes out croaky and broken. "We need to get you back to small heath now" Tommy says seriously, picking me up like a baby and walking me towards the car. I look behind his shoulder to look at the chaos I created. People are running around like headless chicken. The once green grass is now deep red from the blood shed. It's all gone to Shit.