Betrothed To You

Its Gone

I lay in the back of the car basically lifeless, every time we go over a bump in the road I let out a heart groan, gripping onto my still oozing stomach for dear life, the once white rag is now fully red and stuck to my bullet whole. Every time I look into the front seat where Thomas is driving he looked back at me with concern, I mean I know I have a gaping hole in my stomach that is releasing blood like no tomorrow but I never thought Tommy would be so concerned about my well being. "Thomas, I'm going to be fine don't worry" I try to smile reassuringly but we go over a bump just at that time which causes me to grimace and whine. "wait, how did you know I was pregnant, I didn't even know I was pregnant so how could you?" I question him, trying to get into a comfortable position in the two backseats. Thomas looks hesitant at first to talk to me about the baby, his eyes flicker from my paling face to my wounded stomach "Uh, Pol noticed, she told me to make sure I keep an eye on you" He finally says, his knuckles grip the wheel tightly as he puts his foot hard on the gas pedal so we zoom down the country roads. "ahh, Tom slow down" I grumble, I feel the corner of my mouth and pull my hand away a dibble of blood drips down my fingers, I connect eye sight with Tommy and widen my eyes out of shock, what is happening to me? I suddenly start coughing and splatters of blood spray across the back of the passenger seat. "t-that's why you followed me isn't it, so I didn't get myself into any trouble" I ask "well, seems trouble just loves me" I try to laugh but it causes me to cough again, I put my hand over my mouth to try and not make any more mess in his expensive car "Don't speak okay, you need to keep your energy" Every other word he says he look back into the car to look at me and make sure I haven't just died in the backseat. we speed round a corner and make an abruptly halt when we get to the outside of Tommy's large house, I see John pacing outside his front door, biting the skin on the side of his nails, I always shout at him for doing that because one day he is going to bite too hard and make his fingers blood. I tut out of habit in the back of the car. as soon as he sees our car he sprints over and pulls open my door, causing my head to flop backwards where I was leaning on it. His hands quickly grab me so that I don't fall onto the cold concrete. "John" I smile up at him, pure happiness just to see his face oozing out of me like the blood flowing out of my stomach. will this ever stop bleeding because its becoming a real nuisance at this point. "Oh god, Pol shes loosing a lot of blood" John panics, looking behind him i see pol running over to us, her face riddled with panic "Michael call the doctor, we need him here as quick as possible" Polly orders, Michael runs into the house and slams the door behind him. and thats when I black out again.

I peel my eyes open and squeal in agony, I look down and see someone poking and prodding me wearing latex gloves, a pair of tweezers in his hand accompanied with a clamp. "Well this is going to be significantly more difficult now you are awake" the stranger grumbles. My eyes widen in horror when I realise what he is going. "The bullet had shattered inside of you, so it's going to take some time to get all of the different pieces out" his head turns and I see his is talking to John. "john, what's he talking about" I whimper, my hands are shaking like crazy and I can't focus on the people around me with all the pain surging through me. "Is she going to make it?" John barks, his eyes are watery, I have never seen him like this and it's putting me on edge. "John" I whimper again trying to get his attention. His eyes avert from the doctor to me as he rushes to my side and takes my hand in his, he fiddled with my mothers ring on my finger as his eyes knit together "your going to be fine okay, all of this is going to sort itself out and you are going to be fine" it sounds more like he is talking to himself then he is talking to me. Trying to calm his nerves I release my hand from his grip and run it up and down his arm in a soothing manner. "If I can get all the pieces out successfully she has a higher chance of living, but it depends on how her body reacts to me trying to get them out" the doctor continues, ignoring the interaction between me and John. I love John so much I don't want to loose him so soon, not after finding out about us being so close to starting a family. We should be able to have all the time in the world to start a family, I can't die now and loose my chance at starting a family with the man I love. The doctor approaches me carefully placing a hand on my stomach and gripping the clamp sternly in his hand. "Someone grab something for her to bite down on, this is going to be painful"

I bite down hard on the rag Pol brought in for me, my hands gripping onto the sheets bellow me, my hands turning white I'm holding onto them so hard out of nerves. The tweezers search my stomach for the shards on bullet in-beaded inside of me. I let out a blood curdling scream, muffled by the fabric stuffed into my mouth, beads of sweat run down my forehead making my entire face feel clammy and damp. I can't image I look good right now, my face is probably pale and dewy. The feeling of the tweezers in my stomach feels like someone is digging their nails into my stomach and clawing away at my insides. "I can't-I can't keep my eyes open for much longer" as I try to say this my eyes flutter open and closed, "someone needs to do something we're loosing her!" Polly yells, through the small slit in my eyes I see her running around the room in a panic picking up random items. She quickly comes to my side and pats my head with a damp rag "you need to hold on sweetheart, just hold on a little longer" she whispers in my ear. "I-I'm trying" I whisper under my breath, I try to make my voice sound stronger but I can't. The fire in my stomach is too much to handle, and I can feel myself slipping away. "I'm so sorry"

Thomas
Every thought and visual possible is running though my mind right now, I pace while I run my hand through my hair outside of the spare bedroom Evangeline is behind, just the visual of the blood flowing out of her stomach gave me vivid flashbacks to grace, me holding her in my arms while the life slipped out of her right in front of me, her eyes loosing all the life they once held. It was as if history was repeating itself, me holding a dying girl in my arms and rocking her, trying to give as much comfort as I could. Except this time it was my brothers wife, the same wife I was told to take care of and look after. I couldn't even do that simple job. I go repeatedly to open the door and see how she is doing but every time I try I hear her scream again and I can't bring myself to do it, to see her rolling around the bed in pain while somebody prods her insides. The same insides that so recently a baby was growing in. The baby that she no longer has. Because I couldn't do my job.