Chapter 15: First Flash

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"Please stop!" I beg.

I sit on the floor in the corner of a room I share with my three brothers, covering my ears.

I am not covering them from my parents voices, though. No, I'm very much used to hearing them shout. But the children are not.

Jamie is frantically crying, basically screaming, and it is becoming difficult to be so close to him.

"Hush little baby, don't you cry, Lily's gonna give you some wings to fly..." I sing not even hearing my own voice, but it slowly starts working.

Jamie gets more and more silent as I repeat the invented lyrics, and now I can clearly hear my parents's conversation.

"You are such a hypocrite!" Mom yells. "I saw you! I saw you with my own eyes!"

"Why are you lying? I told you myself! I came the moment it happened and I confessed!" Dad argues.

"I'm not talking about that, Patrick! It doesn't matter what you promised me because I saw the way you were looking at her! I saw it with my own eyes and I wish I could unsee it more than anything else in this world!"

"What can I do? What do you want me to do? Do you want me to take my eyes out? Please, do it! Do it if it will make you happy!"

"Stop it."

"No! I'm serious. Here's a knife. Take it and stab it into my eyes. Stab it in my heart if you will!"

A few moments of silence follow. Those moments are the worst, because I can't know what is happening. I worry something terrible might happen.

Then Mother speaks again. But she isn't shouting anymore. "Is that how miserable you are? Is it really that bad?"

Dad cries now. "I can't explain it, Lila! I'm so so sorry. It's out of my control! I wish it wasn't," he yells. "I swear I wish it wasn't..."

"Khhh," I inhale sharply as I wake up. Someone is knocking on my door.

I look to my bedside clock and realize it's 8 am. Right beside the clock, there is a box of sleeping pills I took last night.

Without them, I knew I stood no chance of falling asleep. Both because of knowing Darius is only a few rooms apart and because of my conversation with Simone.

A knock again.

"Go away," I mutter sleepily, still unsure of my surroundings.

I am sure of one thing, though. The dream I've had wasn't just that. It was a memory. A real memory of my childhood.

"Lila! Unlock the door!" I recognize Darius' voice and can't help but to roll my eyes.

"Is that an order, Alpha?" I shout to the door and then cover my head with the blanket.

"What are you pulling off?" he asks calmly. "I just want to make sure you are alright. I am trying really hard not to break this damned door."

I lower the blanket to speak. "I confirm myself being perfectly alright. You can leave now in peace." So dramatic, this guy.

Silence ensues.

Just like in my dream.

Then the door swings open.

My mouth drops, even though I should've expected this, and I lean on my elbow to gawk at him in disbelief. "Seriously? This is too much even for you."

"I tried," he tries to justify himself, walking to my bed, but doesn't sit on its edge. "Why did you lock yourself?" His hands are on his hips. "Are you..." he rubs his beard and I can hear the sound it makes between his fingers, "angry or something?"

I realize he is approaching me with caution. "Now I am." I sit up. "You broke my door."

He exhales in despair. "This isn't your door, Lila. Anyway, just wanted to see you were safe."

Ok, he's my mate, too, but I don't see myself being this paranoid about his wellbeing. "I'd definitely be safer if I had my door."

"That is ridiculous," he takes a few more steps toward the head of my bed. "If anyone is to hurt you, they first have to go through me," he taps his chest and even though I know I said I partially hated his strong masculinity, I can't help but to love this specific gesture.

"Don't you know that?" he asks with a mix of anger and disbelief. Classic male alpha behavior, exhibit one.

I exhale in slight annoyance. "I do know that." Because I really do know he would literally die before he would let anyone kill me, but then again he would do that for all of his protegés and family members, because that's what alphas do.

"Good," he replies a bit relieved. "So don't lock your damned door on me ever again. Better yet, don't sleep away from me ever again." He lowers his head to mine and stares into my eyes. "There's no place safer for you than the one between my arms." He cups my face with his hand. "Get it into your stubborn head already."

I close my eyes. Sometimes his words soothe me to sleep and at other times, I hate his behavior so bad I wanna scream. "I thought you said you weren't gonna touch me until I ask you to."

The corners of his lips curl and his narrowed eyes glitter with playfulness. "Correct. But your eyes begged me to."

I sniff with laughter. "That's one lame excuse. I know it must be really hard for you to resist me, but," I wet my lower lip, "I'm a woman of my word. So touching is a no-no at this point."

"Let's not fool ourselves. We both damn well know you're dying for my kiss. A hot...strong...passionate kiss."

I swallow hard feeling his breath on my face.

"Unfortunately for you, I'm also a man of my word," he straightens up. "I know you're afraid of jumping all over me once we lay in the same bed, but I promise I'm not a sore winner," he winks. "I'll see you tonight in our room, Lila."

I lift my eyebrows. "We'll see if you're a sore loser, little wolf," I say as he leaves.

Ok, so what are the facts?

Now I know sleeping is possible even without him. I glance back at the box of pills near me. Also, he makes my knees totter even when I'm sitting. Then there's the problem I have with his lying, overprotective behavior. And of course, the new reveal: my childhood memories are a lie.

Did I desperately try to leave the werewolf life because I hated the pack ranking or was I actually escaping something else?

I hear the entrance door slam.

What do I do?

I definitely have to have a word with my father.

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