CHRONICLES OF LARRY

Chapter 6. Ever Since New York

Songs for this chapter are :

Meant to be - Bebe Rexha, Florida Georgia Line
See you again - Carrie Underwood
Love - Kendrick Lamar, Zacari

"Whatever our souls are made of, his and mine are the same" - Emily Bronte.

Louis's POV

I go to bed angry at myself for being so mean to Harry. But why should I listen to what he has to say when I've waited for three years?

He makes it look so easy, being apart for three years and jumping to get back together at any chance we get. Of course I still love him so much it hurts , but getting back together wouldn't be the right thing now. We have different lives now.
I'm trying to be responsible for my son and working through my depression.
On the other hand Harry is quite busy with his modeling career. Things are just so different now.
If only 20 year old me knew about the future. I could have devoured all the moments with Harry when I had him.

Not that I didn't.

I don't manage to get any sleep but insomnia is the least of my worries at this point.

The next morning I pack my bags with a heavy heart, which I obviously don't show because I don't want to play twenty questions with any of the boys.
Not that Harry would be interested anyway.
Liam is coming with me as we're both going  to our homes in Los Angeles. I live mostly in London with Lottie, but I have a house in California for when I'm in America, which is more than often.
Liam has a house in Beverly Hills while I have two in Hidden Hills, one for Brianna and the baby and the other one for me. I can afford it as No made quite a fortune when we were still a band. We all did.
Living together with Brianna would have been messy and complicated since we're not even a couple so we just agreed to living separately, but near for Freddie's sake. For this reason, I bought the second house after his birth.
Freddie is my painfully adorable lad.

Zayn and Niall decide to stick around for Harry and I'm so grateful and relieved that he won't be left alone. He has fully recovered though.

I want to ask Liam about him and Zayn but I know now is not the time. I'll bug him all the way to LA about it and make sure he fills me in on everything. Zayn still has a girlfriend though, but I'm not sure whether she's a "beard" or he really is in love.

Harry hasn't said a word to me since last night. I feel partly sad and angry. Sad because I still miss him even though we've been hanging out all week, and angry at myself for last night.

I hate the way I know that he cried last night and it's entirely because of me.

I'm such a dumb fuck.

I've always known that Harry is a soft person, inside and outside. No pun intended.

After a solemn breakfast, me and Liam say goodbye to Harry, Zayn and Niall and head out.

After two hours of NY traffic we're at the airport checking in for our flights to LA.

This is definitely the time to be nosey and ask about Ziam.

I feel a little nostalgic for referring to Liam and Zayn as Ziam. The ship name started back in 2011 by a fan and it became popular just like my very own Larry. I really have to stop thinking about things that will make think about Harry.

When I'm I ever not thinking about him anyway. Sad I know.

As the plane takes off, I launch the ziam ship and conversation.

"So what's going on between you and Zayn" I ask Liam

"I don't know mate. I mean it's just a lot now that he still has a girlfriend."

"Have you guys been talking?"

"Yes, Zayn always felt the need to talk me even after we quit the band. It's funny how after being free of the management we still didn't be with whoever we wanted. You still broke up with Harry and me and Zayn stopped going out all together.
It means alot to me that he kept in touch though and someday I want to see where we can get with this. We haven't specifically talked about it though. "

"Don't worry mate, you'll figure it out with time. Sometimes I'm scared of losing Harry forever. I feel like we can never go back to how we used to be because so much time has passed already. I would give up anything to be with him again, but I'm afraid it's too late. So much has happened already. I have so many uncertainties about how it will never work. "

" Sounds like a shit load excuses to me. Have you talked to Harry about it? "

I tell Liam how Harry broke down yesterday after I not so subtly refused to get back together.

He told me I'm an idiot for hurting Harry and for not agreeing to get back together when I deeply know that it's what I want.

Talking to Liam about Harry helps and my hearts feels less heavy for some reason.

After we arrive to LA, we part ways and promise to see each other soon.

When I get to my house, I head straight to the bedroom to get some rest as I feel so tired. This house is so quiet and long . I text Brianna to have dinner with me and Freddie at her house and she says okay.

I take a quick shower and lay down to think about a certain green eyed angel.

Story of my life.

I'm reluctant to go back to London because I want to see my son and because of Haz. Now that we have started talking again I don't want to be so far away from him, even though we're not together and I haven't talked to him since we left his place.

I call him to tell him that I got to my place safely and he says he's happy to hear that. I can detect his sadness from miles away and it pains me. My thoughts stay that way... Miles away.

I decide to stay in LA for longer. I Skype with Lottie and Nick and tell them everything that happened in New York. My sister is  upset about the way I handled things with Harry but even more upset that there's nothing I can do about it now.

Days pass, with me hanging out with Freddie and sometimes Liam. I talk to Aoki every day and I miss London so much. I miss the rainy pavements, the snobbish teenagers walking around the streets and my family. I miss the Doncaster Rovers FC so much too.

Despite that, I still want to be around. Even though I'm not even close to NY, I want to be around the familiarity of Liam and the boys, since we get to hang out and be in each other's lives again.

Apart from Harry's obviously.

The annoying voice in my head doesn't let me forget.

A/N
Hello everyone, I know I took really long to update, I'm sorry about that.
Last week I was obscenely busy and I couldn't get time to write between studying for my exams and typing endless assignments but now I'm not because I'm done with my exams.

About this chapter, I don't want Louis to go back to London yet, that's why I introduced the concept of him  living in Hidden Hills and Liam in Beverly Hills.
I want the boys to hang out too, which will be in the next chapter.

I'm currently reading the beautiful story of Sean Foster and Flora Morgan (KITEP) by rainbowbrook. Sean and Flora are my favorite couple right now and I legitimately cried so much when they broke up after their trip to NY in the tiramisu and the Kelly bag chapter. I've become so emotionally attached to them lol.
It's a great book people, if you haven't read it you should.

Shameless self promo : I'm working on a second book and I'll release it's tittle in the note of the next chapter :)

Thank you so much for taking your time to read Chronicles of Larry. Y'all amazing.

Love, Jenny.