Fixing the Broken

Sex

03/05/18
Ah yes, the s word. Everyone is doing it and everyone is enjoying it. I've yet to venture into that part of life yet. That's not to say that I don't want to from time to time. There are some really hot guys out there that I would absolutely love to let in my pants! Unfortunately, no one feels the same about me. I have a large sexual side that I never talk about because I feel ashamed. Of course I'm allowed to feel this way.

There are these guys in my gym class and oh my gosh they are so freaking hot! I just want to...ugh. I WANT TO HAVE SEX!! I want to have sex with a beautiful guy that appreciates my body. I want to feel the physical attraction because that's not something I've ever felt before. I've felt the emotional attraction, but I've never had someone appreciate my body.

I always thought that I would be celibate and I hope that I can be. My mind wonders sometimes and I forget about my morals. I just want to run into someone's arms and kiss them and have fun for a while.

I guess at the end of it all I just want to feel love. I know sex isn't the way to do that, but sometimes I do want someone to get close to me physically.

It's a complicated.

I feel myself envying those who are in a relationship and having sex. I don't even think I want a relationship, just the sex. There are so many cute couples at school and word gets around quick about who's doing what.

Adults think that us high school students shouldn't be doing it, but chances are they were when they were in high school. This is the point in life where you find your identity and begin to experiment with your feelings.

Anyways, I'm fascinated with the idea of it. I know that sex is usually a casual thing that people take part in, but to me it seems special. I don't know.

I just want sex.

Also, I really hope no one reads this.