A Girl Like You // D. Swing [DISCONTINUED]

Chapter 15

Journey Hayes

After my shower, I climbed into bed and pulled my knees up to my chest and started crying again. I once read that after losing your virginity, it's pretty common to be emotional but my reason for being emotional is because I was ashamed, regretful, and disgusted with myself. The number one thing I always wanted to avoid after losing my virginity was being regretful and look at me now. Not only was the experience within itself horrible, but now that I think about it, I shouldn't have given myself away so easily but the temptation was a bitch, I'll tell you that and it's sad because the temptation wasn't even worth the hype.

A knock on my door pulls me from my thoughts and I sniff and quickly wipe my tears from my face. "Come in," Just my luck, Dad walks in and he takes a seat on my bed. "Look, I'm not gonna pressure you into talking to me because you know you have the right to speak to me about whatever, whenever. But, when I hear you bawling your eyes out, I have every right to be concerned about your well-being, or what's making you feel this way." He says and my heart starts pounding and my words get caught in my throat.

"I-I'm fine."

"No, you're not because I heard you crying when you first came home and came in here, I heard you crying in the shower, and now you're crying again. JJ, you can talk to me about anything and you know that. I will not judge you whatsoever. I may talk a little shit because as a parent that's what I'm supposed to do but you know not only am I your father but I'm also your friend." He says and at this point, I can't hold it in any longer.

"I-I had sex. I know you always told me to wait until I find that special somebody to lose it to but I went over Hakeem's a-and temptation got the best of me and we end up doing it and I regret it because it was nothing how I imagined it to be. I didn't feel loved, I didn't even feel special while we were doing it! He got his and had the nerve to roll over and fall asleep so I walked home because I couldn't stand to be around him. I feel so stupid and I-I'm so angry at myself for giving into him so easily. I'm so sorry." I cried and instantly he wrapped his arms around me and comforted me.

"It's okay, JJ. I understand why you feel the way you feel but I don't want you to feel like you're a bad kid or a bad person for what you did, alright? At the end of the day, we're all humans and we make mistakes but as long as you learn from them, that's what enables growth, you understand?" I nod and sniff, nuzzling my face into his chest. "I love you and I don't ever want you to feel ashamed about telling me anything going on in your life, okay?" He says and I nod. "I love you too," I say and he kisses my forehead. "Look at me," I pull away and look up at him and he wipes my tears, "Everything will be alright, sweetheart, alright?" I nod my head.

I see a single tear trickle down his face and I felt myself becoming emotional once again. Seeing my dad cry and show his raw emotions really triggered my emotions because I had never seen him like this and knowing he was crying because of me had me feeling a way. "Journey, you deserve a man who makes you feel loved all the time, not only during sex, you know? You deserve a man who knows your worth and adds on to that. Don't ever settle, especially for less than what you deserve, okay? Always know your worth and don't ever let anyone belittle it. You're an amazing girl who deserves nothing but the best. You understand?" I nod my head and he pulls me into a hug. "I love you."

"I love you, too." He pulls away from our hug and he wipes his eyes while I do the same. "Alright, are you hungry?" I let out a laugh and I nod. "I'll be right back with your plate." He stands up and exits out of the room and I do the same and go to the bathroom to blow my nose. I looked in the mirror and seen that my eyes were red and puffy and my nose was red and it was stuffed up. I looked like hell.

I washed my hands and exited the bathroom and went back into my bedroom and crawled into my bed. Dad walked in with a tray that had a plate of alfredo, a small bowl of salad, and garlic bread. "Thank you very much." I grabbed it from him and I said my grace before digging in. "I'll take it in when I'm done." He sets a glass of water on my dresser and he exits my room. In the midst of eating, my phone rang.