hands (professor lupin)✔️

Chapter Ten || The Boy With All The Nightmares

Thursday couldn't come soon enough.

Ruby had been apprised of my reconciliation with Lupin and while he tried to be supportive about it, I could see it was getting harder and harder for him to bear it. I didn't know what to do. Soon after our talk, the pain had kicked in and I was soon crying in the bathroom again.

I really didn't know what to do.

But on Thursday, at 7:50, I picked up my things and went to Lupin's class.

Ruby was sitting in the library with me when I rose and opened my mouth to say-

- Oh. Right, - he cut me off and covered his face, suddenly beginning to read his book with avid curiosity.

I was hurting for him, yet I couldn't not go. I don't think I was hurting any less.

And what is the whole sense of pain if it needs comparing?

The darkened corridors fanned me with their cool silence as I walked, my hands in my pockets, shivering from the cold.

I kept trying not to think of Lupin... but somehow I knew that even before I opened that door, my face would already be flushed.

As I reached the classroom, I paused - and knocked.

There wasn't any answer. Then, finally, I heard someone coming over to the door - and when it opened, I was taken by surprise - a young boy, about thirteen years old was standing in front of me. I had seen him a couple of times in the common room and I knew a couple of things about him. Like that his name was Harry Potter and that he was always up to something and that he was afraid of Dementors and that Lupin liked him very much. But that was it.

- Hello, - he said, a bit nervously and I smiled, remembering I was the adult here after all.

- Hi Harry, - I smiled, as he let me in. I'm Lennie. Pleased to meet you.

I held out my hand and he shook it, smiling awkwardly, but quite sweetly, I thought. He was almost my height - and once again I thought about how kids were higher than me those days.

- Professor Lupin tells me you're quite a wonder, - I said, trying not sound too patronising.

Harry blushed and I let go of his hand, wondering if I'd already done something wrong.

- Well, he told me the same about you, - he said in a low voice and turned his head around.

I looked in the same direction. The candles were all alight and Lupin stood there, the same, now tainted with such agonizing memories, gray sweater on him and the beautiful smile on his face. In this light, you couldn't see the scars at all.

- Lennie. I'm so glad you could join us.

He smiled an extra smile at me and I could feel myself nervously twitching - but I kept my calm. The room was so cozy somehow that I felt like we were just having a friendly chat - I didn't even remember we were supposed to learn the Anti-Dementor spell.

- Now. As Harry knows, I have a Boggart in that trunk over there - he waved his hand - and before we start, I want to explain the spell to Lennie. We've only had one class though, so don't worry, you'll catch up in no time... Now you say-

- Expecto patronum, - Harry interrupted, more from nerves than from anything else. I glanced at him.

- And what else do you have to do?

- Focus on a happy memory, - I said and Lupin turned his eyes to me. - One that is so emotionally charged that it can repel the Dementor. Then your spell will create a shield that will protect you.