His Muse

The best things in life will be the death of me

Copyright © 2018. All Rights Reserved

The first two sketches made it feel like Nic's head was about to rupture into a swarm of hot, fluffy wads of cotton set on fire. It took an entire ten minutes for Nic's brain to transition from Holy shit he's naked he's so naked is everyone else seeing this? Is it just me or is it hot in here? Why is everyone staring at him? Oh shit I've only drawn a stick figure god damn it it's been five minutes to You've drawn him a million times just grow up, will you?

The timer went off after the second sketch and Nic scrapped the paper and dragged his hands over his face, through his hair, and let out the breath that was threatening to tear through his chest if he held on to it any longer. He was thankful that they were all standing-slash-sitting at easels in the dark. The spotlights probably made it more difficult for Kieran to see Nic anyways. And in the dark, the human eye's capability to perceive saturated hues became diminished so Yes, Nic reassured himself, no one can see how fucking red your face is.

In order not to die in the middle of this shitshow, Nic hung onto every last technical thing he learned over these weeks. He marked down the length of Kieran's head and measured his height with it. He pulled at the gesture of Kieran's arm held out, replicated its length to better match the one crossing over his bare abdomen and resting against the defined edge of his hipbone just next to where his soft white flesh dipped between his legs, following his line of pubic hair to—

Shit.

Kieran's expression remained impassive as per usual. Once Nic got around to actually focusing on his drawings, he found himself trying to figure Kieran out. He could hardly imagine what it'd be like to stand in front of an entire class butt naked. It was so exposing that Nic was certain that had they switched places, he would have straight up run out of the room. But Kieran just stood there as motionless as could be, his eyes focusing on the walls beyond all their easels.

It didn't take long for Nic to notice that he was using the poses they practiced in the museum and at the mall. They were simple but dramatic, and graceful as ever. They accentuated his long legs and the planes of his back where his muscles shifted with every transition. Nic illustrated as best he could during those five-minute sketches how toned Kieran was, from the tension in his biceps to his trapezius muscle lining his fluid spine.

The spotlights cast shadows where necessary, to define the general mould of Kieran's abdomen where it dipped and curved towards his bellybutton. Where his extended arms cast shadows over his chest. Where his leg dipped back and darkened the tops of his thighs, and the straight line of his shin.

It felt bizarre to realize that Nic had never even seen Kieran without socks, and it wasn't until they started a twenty-five minute-long drawing that he was even able to realize it. In the middle of the drawing—when Nic started to go in for the details of Kieran's shoulders, neck, face—he realized that Kieran's eyes were directed towards him. It took a second of staring for Nic to remind himself, Oh, right, we know each other, and smile. Kieran's stoic expression nearly cracked for a moment and the slight up-curve of his lip, but he refrained from it.

At Kieran's break time, he pulled on his robe again, and as he tied it around his waist, Nic's professor pulled them all together to critique the drawings. The main lights went on as Nic tore the drawing from his sketchbook, and realized that one of his studio friends was standing next to him.

"What?" he asked, wondering if the heat in his cheeks was still visible.

She glanced towards the center of the room, where Kieran was stepping off the platform. He glanced briefly at them before heading towards the storage room. "Isn't that your boyfriend?" she asked, voice low.