healing your scars (Johnnie Guilbert x reader)

chapter 6

The following is a poem I wrote for y/n to be writing in the story hope you guys enjoy it as much as this chapter.

I sat at my desk. My room as cold as ice, the pencil cluched in my hands ready to write whatever came to my mind. Instead of self-harming or crying I would write poems expressed on how I was feeling. Inspration struck as I got to work the pencil pressed over so lightly on top of the lined paper as I let my mind flow free with Inspration.

Hushed lips. I wrote at the top of the paper and began to write the first stanza.

All those demons in my mind
Make up nothing but lies
Telling me I'm not good enough
Falling for the ones I don't love
eat at my thoughts everyday
Telling me lies I couldn't say

I took layed the pencil in my hand to the side of my desk next to the piece of paper now littered with my own works of creativity. I examined the paper and the words that I gracefully added to the paper. I picked up the pencil again and tapped it ever so lightly on my chin. Anger arose in me as I remembered the sequence of events that happened at Johnnie's party.

I thought about the girl he briefly locked lips with the girl that wasn't me and with that I brought the pencil to the paper and began to spill my emotions.

Hushed lips and fake smiles
Seem to fade away for awhile
holding back the anger
I want to grow stronger
I'm not what they say I am
those rumors come from a different pair of lips that even drags the boys into it.

I thought about the next stanza even more now that I had all different types of mixed emotions bubbling up inside me eager to spill at any moment. I told no lies, the girl was possibly a slut and I knew ot but poor uncontrolled Johnnie didn't if only he had known that my heart wanted him maybe things would be different.

She spoke to highly of the demons in her mind
Saying that they got her and there not going to leave her sight
She was fond of them even though they tore her down
they were the reason why she frowned
Hushed lips hold in so many lies Hushed lips hold the pain deep inside

Can't run away from the ones who do her wrong

Because hushed lips tell no lies....

I placed the pencil back on my desk and looked over the poem I just wrote. Proud of something I actually did I folded the paper into a tiny square and placed it in the drawer of my desk. I placed both of my arms on my desk and layed my head on them both thinking about the past and the present but not the future it was a place I never wanted to visit i know my ways and seeing myself in the future...well that's not possible