Why must I be a screw-up
Why is it that I cause my own demise more than my enemies
Why did my biological father
never try to be there
Why does my adopted father
never give me his approval
but always throws my ever mistake
into my face
Why does it bother me so much
Why do I only have 5 half siblings
of which I only was raised with 3
Why do You, God, care for me
a troubled soul
with few who understand me
Do I unconsciously seek approval of a father
I never seemed to have
Why is it everyone I trusted died
first, it was my grandpa
Then he died of cancer
a day before the birth of my brother
second, it was my grandpa's wife, my grandma
she died of diabetes
before Christmas came
third, it was my pet dog, Texas Red
he died of possible poisoning
on Valentines morning
Do I blame myself for their deaths
am I a curse
did they die because of their association with me
now there is only one I see as truly blood-related
one who shows me the love I always seek
my mom but I watch silently as
she too becomes closer to diabetes
Do I fear trust because I equate it to death
because of my experiences
Why are love and happiness
always in my sight
but out of my reach
then if I do get them
they are blown away
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A/N both an image and song for this one
YOU ARE READING
The Words I Was Too Afraid To Tell Her
PoetryCover by @cutecottoncandyyy Just a few original poems about young women who caught my eye, so to speak. Most of them have never seen these poems. However, there is one exception. No, I will not name her but she did suggest to post my poems, so here...
