Heartbreak Girl // A.F.I

6

Kelsey's POV // Sydney, Australia 

I open my eyes and forget where I am for a second. I quickly realize I'm in Ashton's room. I feel my head laying on someone's chest, and see Ashton laying there, sound asleep. I smile to myself thinking about what he did for me last night, all in an effort to cheer me up after the hell that was last week. That was the best surprise I could've imagined. I sit up, trying not to disturb him as I sit up. The sunlight pours into the room, illuminating everything in there, posters of musicians he likes are plastered on the walls. I notice his shelf of pictures and random knickknacks. I pick up a photo and look at it.

The picture is of the six of us, last summer, on a day-trip to Bondi Beach. That was one of the best, most carefree days that I can remember, and it has become one of my favorite memories. It was a spur of the moment idea to go there, but it reinforces my theory that spontaneous plans are the most fun plans. Calum came to get us that morning and had decided that we were going to get surfing lessons. I remember nagging them for years to take lessons with me because I was too scared to take them alone, and there we finally were. Michael and Jocelyn picked up surfing skills the best, but that wasn't saying much. We were all simply awful, and I remember getting knocked off of my board more times than I can count. After our lessons got over, we spent the rest of the day at the beach, and ended up going to my favorite cafe in the city. We stayed in the area all of the day and didn't end up getting home until like 3 A.M. All of our parents were so mad at us, but it was so worth it at the end of the day, it will be one of the best memories I take with me.

"I remember that day too," I hear Ashton say from across the room. I turn around and see him laying on his bed, giving me a tired smile, he moves to get up, but I walk over to him and sit down close to him. 

"It was a good one, wasn't it?" I say.

"I can't believe that was almost a year ago now. We didn't even have a clue how fast the time would go between then and now, and here we are, months away from moving out and going to uni, it's crazy." 

"I know. Time moves fast when you're having fun, huh?" 

"For sure."

We sit there for a minute, and I look at him again. 

"I wanted to thank you again for last night. Seriously. I don't think you know how much that meant to me, and you checking in on me all week. I was spiraling down a path last week that I didn't like, and I'm glad you were receptive to that...I know everyone else was treading lightly around me, but I appreciate you going the extra step to make an effort," I tell him, and he moves toward me a little. 

"I was glad to. Your happiness is really important to me...I know you know that, but it's true. You're my best friend, after all," He looks me in the eyes, and the feeling I got last night when I saw him walk in the door washes over my entire body. Is my heart playing tricks on me, or is it trying to tell me something?  I really don't think I ever got over him after all. Do I want to follow this feeling? Will we regret it? Fuck it. I know how wounded I felt about Derek, but none of that matters to me at this moment. I realized over this week that I hadn't loved Derek in months. I mourned over the dissipation of an emotional burden I had been feeling for such a long time, and I just felt at peace, even though the abuse still hurt me so so much. I know now that I should've not taken that abuse from Derek, but I didn't know what else to do. He reeled me in with his deceptions, and he even deceived me into thinking I loved him. I now know that I didn't. He never made me feel near the emotions I felt for Ashton. The ones I had shoved down instead of confronting within my own mind. 

Neither of us speaks, but I slowly lean towards Ashton, looking at him. His eyes flicker to look at my lips, and then back at my eyes, and he softly lays his hand on my arm. He leans even closer me, almost close enough to kiss. An almost electric feeling completely takes me over.  Holy shit, holy shit, holy shit, this is finally going to happen. Oh my god. I don't think I ever wanted a kiss to happen more in my entire life.