All Alone

You Are What I Never Knew I Needed

Devin’s POV:

As I make my way downstairs I hear a whole bunch of commotion coming from the kitchen. When walk in I notice Ricky has Chris in a headlock and Balz is running around screaming something or other.

“Ricky and Ghost kissed! Ricky and Ghost kissed! Ricky and Ghost-“ He shuts up as I enter the kitchen and I raise and eyebrow at him before look over at Chris pleading with me.

“Quick question. Balz why are you screaming and Ricky? Why do you have Chris in a headlock?” Balz stops running around and looks at me, as Ricky slowly releases Chris from his headlock and glares at him. Chris puts his hands up in surrender and moves to stand next Balz, wrapping his arms around his waist. Balz smiles up in awe at Chris before turning towards me.

“Because you and Ricky kissed! Do you know how awesome that is!” I shake my head furiously before turing towards Ricky waiting on his answer.

“I had him,” he gestures towards Chris glaring slightly, “in a headlock because Balz wouldn’t shut up so I thought he would shut up if I hurt Chris.” I begin to laugh a little at his statement before I turn back out of the room to go back to my room.

“We didn’t kiss actually, sorry to be a Debbie Downer.” Balz’s face drops to a thin line but I give him a small smile and turn around once again.

“Do you think we should check on him all he does is stay in his room.” Ryan I think, mutters as I walk away not quite out of earshot. Once I make it up to my room, I pull out my sketchbook and sit down on my bed I have yet to sleep in, mind you, I have only been here less than twenty four hours and they are already worried about me. I start to sketch out the mural on the wall behind me as I feel the familiar tingling and burning sensation of my scars on my thighs and wrist. No, Devin, you promised yourself never again. Against my will my body involuntary moves towards the bathroom, pulling me, as if I was under the trance of black magic. Once I arrive at the bathroom, I pull out my packed makeup bag and reach inside, only to find it barren of all blades. Instead of looking for more blades, I dig in my bag for my iron pills, feeling lightheaded slightly. Shit! I must have left them at my house along with my blades.

I fret and shift through the bag, checking once, twice, fifty times just to be sure it isn’t my laziness preventing me from my sweet end. Maybe it’s a good thing, maybe it’s not. Makeup and other toiletries lie across the floor, trailing from the toilet to the shower and bath.

I walk back down stairs for the second time today. “Hey have any of you seen Ricky?” I gaze at all the boys huddled around a fire place that seems to be flickering with a green-blue flame and emitting a weird smell.

“He’s in the practice room.” They all point towards the practice room. I walk to the practice room still felling lightheaded, once I make it to the room, I knock on the door before entering it, the room starting to spin.

“R-Ricky?” His head turns to face mine and I see his eyes fill with worry as he stands up and grabs my hands to steady me.

“Devin, whats wrong?” He looks at my pale face and looks me once over before staring back at me.

“I need iron deficiency tablets and I left them at my house.” I begin to feel even weaker as Ricky walks me out to the SUV and buckles me into the passenger side as he climbs into the drivers side and drives off to my house.

Once we arrive at the house he helps me onto his back and walks inside up the stairs to my room, carrying me with ease.

“Where am I looking?” I lift a shaky finger, jeez Ghost stop being so dramatic, and point towards my bathroom. He falters for a moment before opening the cupboard, grabbing out the orange bottle of tables with my prescription on it.