PRETENDING

CHAPTER EIGHT

I can't believe I actually agreed to do this, pretending to be Mark Tuan's boyfriend, but most important agreeing to come to his mother's charity event. Don't get me wrong, I have nothing against his mother and her charity, I'm actually one of the main contributes, the thing is that I never really come to this types of events. I usually just sent an anonymous check or do it through my mother's name or even my fathers, but never mine. In front of the people that know me, even my parents, I'm just a high school literature teacher and nothing more. My parents never questioned the big amounts of money that I donate because they think that most of it comes from my inheritance, and the money that I have saved up since high school. 

I really don't mind that they think that I live my life pay check to pay check since it meas that my father won't force me to become the next CEO, since he thinks that I know nothing about business. It used to bother me that they think so low of my intelligence specially since I was the one who helped him start his company when I was in my first year of high school, but as the years passed I just got used to it. Besides nothing will come out of people knowing how much money I actually make. The only down side of no one knowing my actual income and how I obtain it is that people take petty on me and kept telling my that it I needed money to pay for my rent, or that I could stay with them for an unlimited time until I was able to fully sustain myself with such a low income, I hated that. I know that they probably just didn't want me to face hardship but having them ask me constantly, was just too much. I ended up stop talking to those people and focused on my students and writing. 

The life of a write is lonely, but that never really bothered me because I preferred it that way. Not having to go out and interact with people is nice; you don't have to pretend to like what they are talking about and you don't have to keep up to date with what is currently happening regarding that social group in order to not appear dull or 'uncultured'. You don't have to worry about fitting in, not that I ever cared about it but still. But look at me, my shy and awkward self, about to get out of Mark's sport's car with a wearing a couple red suit, in front of too many to count cameras that will have articles written even before I have a glass of water. I hate when people stare at me, but they will and I don't know for how long. 

Now that I am about to face the consequences of my reckless decision, I'm questioning my reasoning behind agreeing to this craziness.  How fool of me to think that I can do this, just walk out the car holding Mark's hand pretending that not the entire Korea is watching and getting mad that their beloved Mark Tuan is not longer in the market. 

Glancing at Mark, I softly say, "I'm so sorry but can you turn your car around, I--I just don't think I can do this. There is too many people and cameras. I'm sorry Mark, I---"

"Jinyoung, I won't force you to come out of the car or attend the event with me, but I will tell you this, thank you for wanting to accompany me tonight, the intention is what matters to me and nothing else.  What matter is that you wanted to accompany me and that all, it was unfair of me to ask you to do this when I know that you are shy and hate when there are too many people around, I'm sorry---"

"No, I am the one that is sorry. You went out of your way to get me this suit and the stylist to do my hair and make me look presentable. i'm sorry that all your efforts went to waste. Mark---"

"Jin, its okay. Now I'll get out the care and the valet will go park the car, but if you want you can take it---"

"But how will you get home?"

"I can take a taxi or my family can drive me home. I just want you to arrive safe home, okay?"

"thank you Mark."

He gives me a small warm smile and exits the car with a confidence that I have never seen in a man before.

The valet comes in and frowns at me 

"Sir? um.. are you not going to join Mr. Tuan?"

I looked at valet, who looked down with tinted cheeks 

"There's so many people" I whispered hoping that he would not hear it 

"Does it matter?"

"Huh?"

"If you are with the person you care for, does that really matter. You will be fully focused on your man and on making sure that those bimbos stay away from him." Turning his body towards me he smiles, "He is still there waiting and posing for all the paparazzi to  photograph every inch of him, like they haven't done so before"

"I don't do crowds"

" You don't have to do them as long as you do him"

'Thanks"

With that I master the small courage, the size of a nut or maybe the size of a grain of rice, that exist in my body. 

I don't know who this valet is but he just convinced me to step out of the comfort of the metal that forms the safety of the car and step in front of bright lights of the cameras and the loud voices of people asking who I was, what as I.

Loud voices and flashy cameras blur my vision and hurt my ears. Tears develop in my eyes but I refuse to let them fall. I hate crying yet I do it so often 

"Face the front and smile!" A man dressed in black yells at me 

Looking around my breath quickens. Too many people too many voices, way too loud. I work in a high school with far more living humans then here but this is more overwhelming.  I look frantically around  for a sight of Mark but the flashing lights keep me from seeing clearly. 

Tears are so close to falling  and something builds up on my throat. I feel lost, so lost more than I have ever been in my life. 

Just as a tear manages to escape, I am pulled into a familiar chest 

"It's okay Jinyoung I got you"

Thank you for reading