I was told a lie.. [LAMS- Hamilton. (I DONT OWN THE ART!)]

Chapter 20

Alexander's POV

  Okay!

Before you all freak out!
I know!

I have a lot of explaining to do!

Why is the author making me break the forth wall? I don't know

I don't either, but I don't have the budget to fix it so here we are.

Anywaysss....

  So the party was going fine! I hadn't had anything to drink because I felt pity for John. I was just minding my own business, collecting blackmail. The usual thing you do when you're at a party sober. Then Eliza came up to me...

"Hey Lexiiii~" She slurred out, hiccuping.

"Jesus.. you're so drunk.." I mumbled, cringing at her scent. Eliza giggled drunkly and leaned against my shoulder.

"Guess whattttt~.." She slurred as she giggled. I rolled my eyes and clicked my tongue.

"What?" I say, trying to stay stern. I kept looking her up and down though.. she had a short tight dress on that highlighted her curves nicely.

Wait, no. Bad Hamilton. Bad.

"I think," she giggled once more, and poked my cheek, "that you're reallllyyy cute~" she flirted and giggled. That cute giggle...

Wait what? I haven't drank anything.. why am I acting like this..?

"Um... thanks Liz..." I respond, confused by my previous thought.

"You know what would be realllyy good..~?" She asked, getting closer to me. I tried to back up but I hit the wall.

"Em... What?" I asked, slightly scared but mostly confused.

"This~!" She said with a giggle. I opened my mouth to say something, but before I knew it.

Her mouth was on mine...

My eyes widened with surprise. She pulled away and looked up at me. Her eyes were just...
wow...
I couldn't stop looking into them...
I thought though that I felt something with John...

I can't do this to him...

Can I..?

Something felt wrong yet so right.

I felt so guilty for kissing Eliza. Because I knew something in my heart said I loved John... and he showed signs of loving me back... but what was love to me..?

Will I choose him..?

Or her..?

  Eliza smiled up at me and her eyes seemed to shimmer.

"I really like you Alex.. a lot. Ever since my eyes  laid on you I've been so helpless. I want you to be mine.. just look into your eyes and the sky is the limit... I'm so helpless.." she swooned over me. I felt my heart pound in my chest and my face grow hot. By heart felt like it was beating out of my chest.

But was it out of guilt or love..?

I really can't tell the difference anymore.

Maybe I just felt pity for John and that's why my heart always skips a beat when I'm around him.

Because I feel guilty for lying about love?
But this is what I was told love is like...

Why are human emotions so complicated?!

"Lexi~?" Eliza swoons again. I snap out of my trance, and look at her. My face felt like it was on fire. Eliza slowly got closer to me. To the point where I could feel the heat of her body against me even though we weren't touching. My heart rate sped up.

"Stop being so cute.." I mumbled to Eliza. Her face went a light shade of pink and she giggled.

That giggle is so sweet...

Why am I realizing this now?

I smile at her. I leaned down and kissed her cheek gently. Her eyes widened and her face went red. She squealed slightly. I chuckle at her cute behavior.

"You just-! I-... You- I-..." she stuttered and squealed again. My face felt hot as her face glowed a bright red. She giggled as she looked up at me. I leaned down and pecked her lips gently. She froze and her face glowed bright red. She realized how much she must've been blushing, and she hid her face in her hands. I chuckle and smile at her. I gently grabbed her hands and removed them from her face. I held her hands in mine. She looked up at me while blushing. Her eyes seemed to glisten. Be both just took a moment and stared into each other's eyes. Next thing I know her mouth is on mine and I don't say no. (Sorry)

As I kissed her I felt a spark or pang in my heart. My heart beating against my chest. Somehow I was still confused whether it was love or guilt. We kept kissing when I heard a huge slam of a door. I pulled away from Eliza and looked where I heard the noise. She had flinched and she held onto me. Her arms were wrapped around my neck.

"Where's he going?" Laf asked suddenly. Everyone had went quiet.

What was I forgetting again?

"Why'd John just leave like that?" Angie asked. Everything else seemed a blur and I wasn't even intoxicated.

I felt a pang in my heart again. But this time I knew what it was.

Pure Guilt.