issue | james potter

11 | WHATEVER THIS IS

issue
act 2; part 1 | whatever this is
...

"SO ARE WE just going to not talk about it?" James whispered, his attention fully on the girl seated next to him. To his disappointment, he was met with nothing but silence as she continued to write every word that left their professor's lips. He sighed, trying his best to pay attention to Slughorn, but the words on the chalkboard seemed like gibberish to him. He shakes his head, trying to keep his mind off the events that had transpired a few nights ago.

"Alright class, I'm expecting that essay on Felix Felicis on my desk by the end of this week. You are dismissed." Students quickly gathered their things and raced out the classroom. However, James stayed behind and waited for Diana to put her things back in her bag.

"Di, come on. Look at me, at least." James said exasperatedly, following her out of the classroom. Diana tried to walk as fast as she could, but James easily matched her stride. The strap of his book bag was starting to slip from his shoulder, but he paid it no attention and followed her down the hall.

"I can't talk to you right now, I have a class to get to." Diana said, her head down as she tried to avoid bumping into other students.

"I know for a fact you don't. It's your free period." James said, walking past her and stopping in front of her. "Just, please?" His eyes looked at hers, pleading.

Diana sighed, "Alright."

The two walked in silence to one of Hogwarts' many courtyards. Students were milling about, minding their own business, but some couldn't help but notice the tension that surrounded the two. It didn't really take a genius to notice it. James' jaw was clenched, the bags under his eyes were dark and heavy. Diana didn't even dare look at James, her eyes fixated either ahead or on her feet. There was also a significant distance between the two, a person could walk between the two of them and they didn't have to make way.

Once they reached a courtyard, Diana sat down on one of the benches and placed her bag beside her. James stood in front of her, a few feet away, keeping his distance.

"Can we talk about it now, please?" James said, running his hands through his already messy hair.

"What do you want me to say?" Diana looked up at him and whispered tiredly, just loud enough for him to hear.

"I don't know. Something, anything. Just talk to me, Di." James said, stuffing his hands inside the pockets of his trousers. He wanted to talk to her about the kiss for a while and now that they were, he didn't know what to say.

"It's just, I-" Diana stops herself, hesitating. "I don't know what to do here, James!"

James stayed silent, he knew when Diana was getting ready to go on one of her infamous ramblings. At this point, he knew her like the back of his hand. He knew when to stay quiet and when to keep talking, this was one of the times for the former.

"I was perfectly alright, okay? Sure, my Hogwarts years aren't exactly the most exciting but I was fine with it. I was perfectly fine with blending into the background. I was ready to graduate and get out of here peacefully, without an ounce of stress or drama. I was fine." She said without taking a single breath, worrying James for a moment, but he waited for her to go on. "Then you just came along and you ruined it. You waltzed into my life thinking you're so high and mighty. Coming up with this preposterous plan, that I didn't even want to agree to in the first place."

"Then why did you?"

"At first, it was because of Carson. Now, I don't know anymore. I don't know what to do or how to feel. Hell, I don't even know where I stand with you." Diana replied. James just stood there, trying to process everything that she had just said.

She waited for him to say something, and when he didn't, she just looked at him dejectedly. "Don't worry, I know. It was just a mistake. It meant nothing."

"I'm afraid you don't get to decide that, Di." James laughed, looking back at her with a small comforting smile. The sun shone brightly behind him, giving him an almost golden glow that Diana couldn't help but feel her breath get caught up in her throat.

"W-what?" She stuttered, looking at him in confusion.

"I'm the one who kissed you." James took long strides towards her, his eyes never leaving hers. "I get to decide if it was a mistake."

"And?" she whispered back, trying her best not to get too hopeful.

He knelt down in front of her so his face now slightly leveled with hers, "It wasn't."

"Look, I'm not entirely sure either what's going on. I don't what this is or what we are. But I know that I don't regret anything, Diana." He said sincerely, searching her eyes for any form of emotion.

"Then where do we go from here?"

"Whatever this is, whatever we are," He said, gesturing to the two of them. "We'll figure it out together. All I know is, we don't have to pretend as much anymore."