Yoon Bum x Reader: Mindfuckery

Chapter 14: Plan

Your mind had become an invisible notebook, a veritable encyclopedia of this man's triggers and weaknesses. You now knew to avoid the word 'disgusting' when regarding anything Bum does or wants. The manic look in his eyes when you used it was one you never intended to elicit again. If he'd had an actual weapon on hand at that exact moment, you weren't entirely sure he wouldn't have used it on you. All the same though, your head still ached from that mistake.

A full-on reversion had occurred here, and not to the bright beginning where your presence was still a delightful novelty to Yoon Bum. At that point he still fawned over you with doe-eyed wonder. Instead, this was an atavism to misery, a state of punishments and outbursts. You had been forced to backtrack after insulting him, taking care to make sure you wouldn't take a sledgehammer to another limb. It was quite a bit easier than the first time, as you no longer had to gauge his temperament. You knew exactly the words you needed to strike the correct chord on his heartstrings. You could shift the air between you two the way Calypso churned the seven seas. Yet after a solid week with no sunlight, things were beginning to look bleak.

After your past history of behavioral experiments proved fruitful, you realized what this situation had become. This was a battle of mental fortitude and there could only be one winner. Though his trust in you had dwindled, every day you could still see that softness in his heart for you. You needed to cultivate it, spread it, let it fester. It was at this point you couldn't believe the level of despicable trickery your own mind could come up with when it was desperate enough. There seemed to be only one option if you were bent on sparing his pathetic life. You were going to have to mentally break him, utterly destroy him, and rebuild from there. This newfound plan your mind hatched was a long one, but that didn't seem to be a problem when all you had was time.

If this were a story about superheroes, this would have been the moment you became the villain, the defining event that instigated your descent into the proverbial dark side. Yoon Bum was now your enemy, and you had a definitive stockpile of weapons in your arsenal to defeat him with. Though grim your mentality had turned, Bum could still not be considered the quintessential hero. This was a showdown of evils, a ruthless clash between two dark forces. Who would be there to protect him, you wondered, when the very last person on earth who cares... turns...

Bum was a fool to believe he was the only one hurt by this whole debacle. How could someone you fought to protect, whose broken emotional state you perpetually catered to, betray you so easily? It wounded you deeply and your resentment began to surface...

After a long stretch of what you would call "solitary confinement," your jailer allowed you to emerge from the depths of the earth. You squinted when the light from the kitchen window burned your retinas. You felt weak, sickly; and you briefly wondered if this is what Bum feels like all the time. You almost didn't retain enough arm strength to haul yourself onto the roller chair. All the same, your muscles shook in the process. Food appeared in front of you and you declined it in silence.

"Again?" Bum grimaced. This was the second day of your hunger strike and he was at a loss of how to handle it. "Please eat, F/N..." He pleaded softly. "I made your favorite..." Bum certainly knew how to tempt your resolve. Just the smell alone made your stomach growl loud enough for him to hear. A tiny hopeful smile found his lips, one you didn't see because you were refusing to look at him. "Ah, see? You are hungry." He swept over to you, spoon in hand, and scooped a generous bite onto the utensil. He blew on it to ensure you wouldn't burn your tongue and held it up to your mouth. You leaned away and his smile disappeared. "What's wrong?"

"..."

"What's wrong?!" He demanded it this time. When you ignored him again, he threw the spoon across the room and it made a significant noise when it hit the wall. He spun the roller chair, forcing you to face him. "When are you going to answer me?!"

"...!" When he saw the abrupt terror in your eyes, Bum's animosity softened.

"...I'm sorry." He gazed down at the floor and stepped away from you. "I didn't mean to yell at you... I'm just... worried about you." He went and retrieved a clean spoon for you before kneeling down and nuzzling his face into your lap. "I miss the sound of your voice."

"Bum." He immediately snapped his head upwards to look at you, elated by the sound of his name on your lips. "Can we go outside today? You promised."

"Ah..." His relief suddenly disappeared. "M-maybe some other time. I... need to know I can trust you again first." A little piece of his heart began to hurt when he saw you hang your head. He tried to circumvent your sadness. "Um... how about you finish your food? I made it special for you. Then maybe afterwards we can play a game?"

"..." Your silence was making Bum nervous. You always had something to say until now. Had your exile really hurt your feelings that much? You stared out the window as your food got cold and Yoon Bum could instantly sense that something was wrong.

"F/N?"

"Why is he doing this to me... Why..." You muttered under your breath.

"Huh? What do you mean?"

"Let's go home..." You stared past him in a daze. His gut immediately churned with unease. You plopped to the floor on your knees and began to crawl towards the hallway.

"F/N? What are you talking about? We are home." He placed a restraining hand on your shoulder, sinking down to your level. He felt a spike of fear when he saw the glazed-over look in your eyes. It was as if you were staring right at him but didn't see him.

"Bum... I need to find Bum..." You chanted, looking in all directions. His eyes widened.

"I'm right here, F/N!" But you gently nudged him aside and continued your frantic search.

"Bum!" You called louder, hastening your crawl until you reached the end of your chain. "EH?!" You yanked at it and called out. "UWAAH! Let me go!" You thrashed the chain violently and Bum gasped at your outburst. You began to cry.

"F/N! What's wrong?! What's wrong?!" He gripped you by the arms, shaking like a leaf. You allowed yourself to catch your breath and looked him in the eyes. For an instant, Bum felt relief; you definitely saw him now.

"Sir? Can you help me?"

"Ah!" His comfort blew out like a candle in a hurricane.

"Please! I have to find Bum! I need him... I love him..." He felt a sick mixture of joy and horror. It had been so long since you professed your love that he'd been afraid you didn't care for him anymore. However, this was a terrible and ominous way to receive it. "Bum needs... my help..."

"F/N! I'm right here! Please come back to me!" Tears spilled from his eyes and he shook you by the shoulders with more ferocity and desperation this time. Only when he was at a loss and sobbing did you finally snap back into reality.

"Bum?" The instant he heard your normal tone, he felt his burdened heart lighten. "Why are we in the hallway?"

"F/N!" His lips turned upward in a broken smile and he threw his arms around you. "You were hallucinating, F/N! It was like you were dreaming but I couldn't wake you up!" He sobbed in your embrace.

"Wow, really?"

"Yes! I was so worried. I thought I lost you."

"That's scary. Glad to be back I guess." You pulled him back to look at him. "Can we go outside today? You promised." You repeated once more, a foreboding energy now overtaking the house. Yoon Bum's jaw set in fear. He nodded quickly; quivering at the possibility that declining again would make you leave him for good.

'Heh. All according to plan...'