bloomsbury's pride // bts ot7 // editing

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  I'm overthinking my pride but I don't gotta look nice. she just digging my ice - joji

standing in front of your parents wearing only underwear is one thing. standing in front of someone you respect wearing only underwear is a whole other thing. the cherry on top in this situation really is standing in front of an entire school plus the people you love in only underwear to prove a point. now the added adrenaline comes from the possibility of being expelled from the school. mr. cranston certainly isn't happy but neither is namjoon so maybe things will end up working out in the end. 

her office feels more crowded than usual when they get inside. the tension boils namjoon's blood, the extra embarrassment raising the blush in his cheeks faster. "kim namjoon, to say i expected more from you... it's an understatement in this situation. even if i can save you from expulsion, there's no doubt this will lead to some sort of punishment. you have endangered the school's reputation and the principal might come down harsher for that alone." namjoon sinks into his chair. 

"i-i-i'm sorry. i didn't mean to cause any trouble." it's all he can afford to say for now. 

she looks up with pursed lips before sighing, and reaching over to hold his hands. "if there was something going on, you should have talked to me about it. i could have helped you." but it was seemingly too late. he faced, not just a blemish on his perfect record, but the end of the best period of his life. namjoon would lose everyone he ever loved sincerely, he would lose his one place of solace, and most importantly, he would lose the sense of himself that made him happy. he would never be happy again, namjoon realized, and started to cry. mrs. cranston is taken aback by the sudden tears pooling on his face but smiles fondly at the boy. 

"it's going to be okay, namjoon. it's gonna be okay."

standing outside the door is jungkook and jimin very obviously concerned for the older. he puts on a fake smile as a mask. the three boys stand there until jimin breaks the ice and turns to leave. "we need to talk." they walk in complete silence from the counseling center to namjoon' old room, the mask falling off his face as soon as they turn their backs to him. there are new bed sheets on his bed, his old desk filled with little knick knacks and toys that weren't his. namjoon's flooded with the hurt almost instantly- how could they have replaced him so quickly? 

he tries to mask is emotions as best as he can by rationalizing. obviously he hasn't been here in a while, the side was empty to take and he gave up ownership by moving out. namjoon has no right to feel anything because of this new roommate. jimin kicks his legs up onto the bed sheets and namjoon realizes that jimin has to be extremely comfortable with the other person to even want to put his feet up on the bed. jungkook politely sits on the bed, hand folded in his lap like a proper boy. 

namjoon sits down on the floor, twiddling with a loose strand of gray hair, his ear piercing getting itchy and heavy on his lobes. he doesn't look up to meet anyone's eyes and instead chooses to sit there with his emotions laid bare. he doesn't want to look up to see scrutinizing glares and pitied looks. "hey, joon, look at me? please?" jungkook's voice is so quiet, so pretty, and it's the sound of this soft voice that completely unravels namjoon's tightly wound chest. the rest of the tears start to come as he looks up. 

jimin's breath hitches in the back of his throat, the furrow in his brow increasing as he rushes what he wants to say. "we missed you. we missed you so much, namjoon, and it hurts you abandoned us and i miss you. hoseok fucking bawled his eyes out for a week when he realized you were gone. he spent literal hours buying things to make this room feel complete again. he blames himself everyday for you leaving. i'm not mad at you, i just wish you talked to someone. to anyone. because it feels like we failed you and weren't enough to be with you."