𝐋𝐀𝐒𝐓 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐍𝐂𝐄 ༄ 𝗋. 𝗍𝗈𝗓𝗂𝖾𝗋

Numb to The Feeling

Lilian
✥

Richie went out of the hospital, and we decided to go to my house. We sat on our favorite spot; the rooftop.

There was silence for a moment, dead silence. I blurted out: "What made you do it?" "Hm?" Richie hummed. "Why did you hurt yourself?" I asked with a low voice.

"I did because, I had nothing left, not you, my friends hated me, my mom thinks i'm a fucking pain in the ass. And I still think like that." He started to tear up.

I held his soft damp cheek, "Richie, you have me. We have each other. And i'd be lying if i said i was fine either. I'm messed up too, okay?"

Ever since i got out of the hospital i started cutting, just severe depression. I literally don't  have anyone or anything.

I feel empty, I feel like nothing. I live as if i'm a dead body. Its almost like I'm numb; like I can't feel anymore. Sometimes I think i'm a coward because i failed to do what Richie almost did.

I started wandering in my own poisonous thoughts. "Lili!" Richie screamed. "Uhm...sorry, I musta spaced out." I whispered.

"Are you okay?" Richie asked, "I'm fine." I said in an aggressive manner. "Are you sure?" He kept questioning further and further.

"Yes! Now lay off my pussy!" I yelled. "I'd love to, but I can't, doll." he smirked. I rolled my eyes "Doll?" I huffed.

"Because you are as perfect as a doll in my eyes." He mused. I simply pecked him on the cheek and patted his head. "Good job boyfriend."

"What the fuck? I'm not a dog." He snarled. "Sure smell like one. Like seriously when do you ever shower?" I joked. "What? I fucking showered this morning and put cologne on just for you." He fumed.

"Relax, relax I'm just kidding." I chuckled. "You fucking better be." he told me off. "Oh really? Then I'm not." I said and laughed as I jumped off the roof to the freshly cut, prickly grass.

"Get up here!" He grunted. "I guess you'll have to chase me fucker." I yelled from the ground.

He jumped down the roof and began to run towards me, I scooted a bit to the left then he fell face first to the needle-like grass.

I just began cackling like crazy. "I have a really neat idea." I beamed. "What?" He asked as he pushed up his glasses.

"Lets take my dad's car and drive it around town." I said. "What? Remember when we messed it up and shit?" He reminisced.

"I have a paint bucket. I'm sure we could improvise." I shrugged. I went inside the garage, Rich following me, I got the paint bucket and two brushes.

I started painting on the soft navy blue paint on the rusty car, Richie splashed paint on me. "You asshole!" I squealed. "I know I am doll!" He laughed.

I bopped a dot of paint on his nose. "You look like a drawing now." I laughed. "I'm sorry what was that? I couldn't hear you over my cuteness of a 'nose'." He said in a cocky manner.

"Aw, don't get cocky now! We all now how low your self esteem is." I exclaimed. For the rest of the day we painted the car, then we put outside to dry for a couple hours.

At about 6 PM we took it out for a drive, it was still wet but we wanted to try driving. I took the wheel first.

I slowly tried driving out of the driveway. Richie panicking wasn't making me anymore calm. "Shut the fuck up Rich! I need to focus." I ticked him off.

I soon got out of the driveway and Richie kept taking deep breaths and I just zoned out in my own world. I just focused on driving. So, I slowly started to drive down the street.

Then I sped up just a bit. "Huh, this isn't as bad as I thought. Then I got to a wide point of the road and I made a U-Turn.

I went drove back to the driveway and Richie breathed out: "holy shit! We didn't die!" "Stop fucking exaggerating I was good." I rolled my eyes.

I got out of the car and tossed Richie the keys, "alrighty, now its your turn." I said. I got in the passenger's seat and Richie closed my door. When he got in I said "why, thank you young man." I laughed, and he did too.

He backed out the driveway safely and slowly. He drove down the street and since we wanted to, we drove to the ice cream parlor from the back.

Richie picked up driving pretty fast, and he was pretty good at it. Once we arrived at the ice cream parlor we sat for the next 30 minutes, laughing and eating and just being what we wanted to be.

We got out of the parlor and went to the car, I was driving this time. I drove back to the house and Richie ran out of the car because he had to pee.

Once i unbuckled my seatbelt I saw something in the rear view mirror, I didn't know what it is, I just ignored it though, probably just my mind playing tricks on me.

I got out of the car and I saw my dad, "Lilian...sweetie. You learned to drive without me?" He said sad. "You just couldn't wait could ya?" He said with a devilish grin.

I began to cry and then I saw him turn into IT. He fucking played with my thoughts, he made me think my dad was alive.

He ran towards me and I huddled up, it was silent. I was confused then I stood up and looked around the garage, no one was here; i cried uncontrollably from this demon that no one could get rid of.

Richie ran into the garage, "Lil, are you okay? Did something happen? what's wrong?" He started asking all those questions and I just fell to the floor. He hugged me tightly. "IT was here...IT was here, Rich. But...but I saw my dad and-" I shuddered but he cut me off.

"Lili, IT's just playing tricks on you, don't believe anything IT does, keep that in mind okay doll? I want you to remember that. Because what if I'm not here? I need you to stay smart and focused for me , okay? So I can kiss your beautiful lips forever." He smiled, cheering me up.

I looked into his eyes demandingly, like I was craving something. Like I was hungry for his affection. He kissed me softly, then he soon harshly pressed his lips onto mine. He tried to insert his tongue asking for an entrance. I allowed him one.

We made out for an hour and when we finished, I looked at him and joked: "damn when did you get feisty?" "I've always been doll. I just haven't had the chance to show anyone." He smirked.

I shook my head in disbelief, and went upstairs. I wore my pajamas and got ready for bed. Once i laid on my bed and Richie joined me. I slept in comfort and safe arms

I hope you liked this chapter my dear dear readers, it feels good to write again for you all.💘