pretty boy like you // harringrove

13.

“Steve? Shit. It’s Chloe. Can you come pick us up? Karen... We’re at Tommy’s- shit, girl. Steve, she's a wreck and our ride ditched us and-”

“I'll be right there.” Steve shook a sleeping Billy next to him awake. “We've gotta go. Chloe just called, she and Karen are stranded at Tommy’s and Karen's a fuckin’ mess.”

Billy yawned. “Yeah, yeah. Lemme just get dressed.”

“I'll be in the car.”

☆☆☆☆☆

When they pulled up to the house, Chloe was sitting on the front steps while Karen smoked a cigarette. From far away she looked alright, but as Steve got closer he saw the bruise on her thigh and dried blood on her nose.

“Kay? What happened?” Steve jogged over, grabbing Karen's head and inspecting her face. She just laughed a little and wobbled over to the car without answering. Chloe looked pissed, but behind that, sad.

“She got really high. Look, you know me, I am not anti-drugs, but I found her alone with some fucking grown-ass man, doing coke. It isn't the first time either. The first time I thought she was just experimenting or something, but she's clearly, like, not.”

“You think she has a problem?”

“She's wasted every night. Caught her popping pills in the school bathroom at nine am yesterday.”

“Shit.”

When they got back to the car, Karen was slumped over in the backseat, and Billy was shaking her. “She came in, said hi, and then passed out. What is she on?”

Chloe shook her head as Steve filled Billy in on the situation. “I don't know what to do anymore. I think we have to talk to her.”

Steve and Billy nodded. Anything to help Karen. Meeting her might not have been ideal, but she was an incredible friend, and risking her anger was worth trying to help.

☆☆☆☆☆

When they got back in the house, the group of them sat in Steve's living room, surrounding Karen, who was passed out sitting up on the couch. They all took turns sleeping, making sure Karen didn't puke. It was Chloe’s turn to keep watch when Karen woke up. “Clo?”

“Yeah, it's me.” Chloe sighed and placed her chin on her knees. “Do you need anything?”

“No. I'm just tired. How did we end up at Steve's?”

“I caught you doing coke with a man in his mid thirties, completely alone, so I found Tommy’s phone and called Steve to pick us up.” Karen flinched.

“Hey, man. Please don't tell my parents. If they find out I'm using my ass is grass.”

“Jesus Christ, Kay. You know that dude?”

“He's my dealer.” Karen avoided Chloe’s eyes.

“So this isn't just getting buzzed at a party.” Chloe said. Steve and Billy had woken up, and were sitting on either side of Karen, looking concerned. “This isn't casual, is it? This isn't recreational. This is a problem.”

Karen shook her head. “Man, you're crazy. It's fun. It's nothing. So what, I do it a bit more than the others. It's not a big deal.”

“Karen, I've seen you pop pills at nine in the morning, more than once. You're off your ass constantly. I can't remember the last time you went 24 hours sober.” She rolled her eyes at Chloe, looking annoyed.

“It's no big deal-” She said. Her nose started to bleed. She shook her head. “Clo, not a word.”

“You can't expect her to just shut up about this, Kay! That's not fair.”

“Maybe we should talk later,” Steve said, butting in. “When we're less tired.” Billy nodded.

Chloe stood up. “Fine. But this isn't the last of this conversation, Kay. You're coming home with me.”

After the two of them left, Steve and Billy moved to the bed and stayed there the rest of the day.

☆☆☆☆☆

Karen sat up in bed next to Chloe, and Chloe shook her head and dug her nails into her palms because they had done this enough times for her to know that Karen would light a cigarette (because she's a goddamn cliche, and of course she would) and be gone before she had to butt it out. Before she lost her nerve, she blurted, “I can't do this anymore. Be with you, like this, I can't do it.” Her heart was pounding in her ears. She thought maybe Karen could hear it.

“What?” She asked, smoke pouring out of her mouth. “What do you mean?”

She shook her head harder. “This. Us. I can't be… an experiment. I can't be your token queer friend who you fuck around with because well, she likes girls, she can't have human fucking emotions.”  

Karen furrowed her eyebrows. “Chloe, I thought-”

“No, Kay. You know I like girls. This isn't an experiment, to me. This is part of me. A pretty big part of me. You can go find some other straight girl to mess around with, but it can't be me and it shouldn't be a gay girl, because it's not fair.”

“I don't understand, you said-”

“I know what I said. I was wrong, okay? I was wrong about this being okay. You kissed me and I said it was okay but it wasn't, it was a really fucking shitty thing to do and it shouldn't have happened, you shouldn't have done that to me.”

“Are you saying you regret it?” Karen's cigarette was hanging by her side, forgotten.

Chloe sneered, and Karen was reminded suddenly of how they met, Chloe slapping Billy in the fucking face and calling him a whore. “Are you saying you don't?”

“Chloe, what-”

“Look, we've been messing around for months and you haven't kissed me. I know girls like you.”

Karen's face fell. “Girls like me? What does that mean?”

“I mean you're so fucking desperate for a boy’s attention you're willing to do anything for it, even look for it in a girl. This always happens with you straight girls - you use and use and use me until there's nothing left and then you keep going. And I just can't do that. I can't.” Her voice broke and Karen felt her heart fall out of her chest.

“Shit, Chloe, I’m not using you, that's not what this is.”

“What is it then?” Chloe glared, and Karen realized again how intimidating Clo could be when she felt the need. “I think you should leave.”

“Please.”

“I can't. Please. Just… leave.” Karen stood up and walked out the door. As it clicked shut, she felt like she was leaving something very important behind.