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Chanyeol was staring at his ceiling as if the thing had any sort of entertainment to provide him. However, the blankness of it was enough for the moment, it was comforting.

 I called him a "size-whore". I actually called Sehun a size-whore... Chanyeol sighed pressing his thumbs on his temples. It's been two days since that happened and, luckily for both of them, they hadn't once seen each other. The only way that Chanyeol knew Sehun was still alive was his messages on their group chat.

 I should've talked to him. When I reached out to him, I should've talked to him, I should've apologized...He even said he wanted to apologize too...God, we could've ended this! The brunette mentally scolded himself, his hands fisting the sheets.

 But he said some cruel stuff too...He can't call me back a whore just because I screw around- I'm his hyung, I love him and I've been doing so much for him all these years! ...And then... Yixing-hyung? His first? When did that happen, why didn't he ever tell me? We're best friends for fuck's sake. I didn't even know about Jongin... Chanyeol's selfishness took over once more, subconsciously blaming Sehun all over again. But he was better than that.

 Fuck, no, that's not how it goes Chanyeol...Sehun has his reasons, that's his side of the problem. He should figure it out himself as I should also deal with my own shit if we want to get this over with. If he wants it too, that is... He reasoned himself and pulled his hair back, running his fingers softly through the unwashed locks.

 It was their week off and the giant had spent his first two days locked in his room, overthinking, regretting and basically overanalyzing and repeating his thoughts. He never thought he could lose control with Sehun like that, never did it cross his mind that he would end up insulting and probably hurting his maknae this way. He didn't have the guts to face him after what he said. Call him a coward, but he still loves Sehun and he wants to find the right way to make it up to him. He owes him that much.

 He turned to his side and tried to get some sleep, ignoring the turned on lights. He tried to forget. Chanyeol's mind was taking him to places he could only hope to live again. His only getaway when things went south, the only way he could press back his unwelcomed thoughts.

Japan.

It was two years ago that he and Sehun had gone to Japan together. That week they spent there was Chanyeol's most treasured memory with the younger. It was his safe place, his comfort zone, his everything whenever Sehun wasn't around to comfort him just by existing.

 Now he needed that comfort zone. His eyelids softly closed and he let out a breath he hadn't realized he was holding.

He remembers.

.

.

.

.

.

2 years ago, Japan

The sun had set hours ago and yet they were still out. Chanyeol had insisted on trying out a traditional Japanese pub he had seen along during their earlier stroll, and Sehun wasn't one to turn down an offer that promised liquor. The dancer had his own preferences despite his low liquor tolerance. Once Sake was brought in the picture, he was effortlessly convinced.

Their hotel room was quite far from the area, so they easily decided to spend the night on the motel that the pub included on the upper floors.

The pub was all wooden, from the building structure to the furniture that decorated the place. They were both in awe by the beauty and the simplicity of the place. A huge man-made tree was placed on the centre of the floor and the tables around it resembled chopped off tree trunks.

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