Phan Smut Oneshots {Discontinued}

Lost Love

Genre: fluffy smut

Word Count: 4245 (oof this is the longest fanfiction I've ever written)

Summary: Dan and Phil used to be the best of friends, both harbouring intense feelings for each other, but when they went their separate ways for university, they drifted apart. Six years later, Phil still has a slither of hope that he will see his best friend again one day. When Phil's friends drag him to a party, fate seems to be on his side.

There were some days where I thought about that brown haired boy more than others, and today was one of those days he had unwittingly found his way back into my head. It happened when I was clearing out my room and had somehow managed to come across a box full of my old school junk. The books were stacked precariously on top of each other, their bright colours not emitting happy memories, instead reminding me of the grim reality of the place.

I picked up the top book, inspecting the label identifying it as my maths book and flipped it onto a random page. Where I assume maths sums should have been, there were doodles of various creatures, leaving barely any room for the work itself. I immediately knew that they didn't all belong to me, and the clumsily drawn llama further enforced this. These characters strewn about the page brought back memories of lost lessons, hours spent drawing and playing pointless games of noughts and crosses, lessons where we'd often get told off for not paying attention, but neither of us cared.

I threw the book back onto the pile; I'd tried my best to forget about Dan, or at least think about him less, but I couldn't do that when I did stuff like this. I pushed the box back under my bed, out of sight, under the pretense that I'd never have to look at it again.

Dan and I had been practically inseperable, we'd even ended up going to the same sixth form. I remember late night Skype calls, stretching for hours until we saw the first rays of sun shining through the clouds, nights spent talking about anything we could think of just so we wouldn't have to say goodbye.

In sixth form, we only took one class together: art, so we couldn't spend as much time in each other's company, but we'd always managed. Mutual friends had told us we were cute together for as long as I could remember, and it was these constant reminders that planted the seed. Would it work? These feelings first emerged on their own at the end of high school, and I'd often wondered how he'd respond. As far as I knew, he was straight, I'd even given him relationship advice for girls in the past, much to my disappointment.

I'd eventually come to terms with the fact that it probably wasn't ever going to happen, that I should just give up. When we left for our separate universities, it hurt at first, but over time, I got used to not seeing my best friend every day.

We stopped skyping, too. I don't know why, I think we just drifted apart. I tried not to get too upset, insisting to myself that it was best for both of us; I could just... Forget about him.

I was startled out of my training of thought by the obnoxiously loud ringtone of my phone. Sighing, I picked it up to see PJ was calling.

"What's up, Peej?" I said, trying to mask my melancholy mood with a bubbly voice. We'd become friends at uni, and he'd never left me alone since.