Good day to all!
Our Critique Shop is open to all aspiring writers who wants an honest feedback about their story.
Our aim is to help you achieved your dreams as a writer by criticising your work.
📕Author: FiaOmpadCabugason 📕Story Title: Can Hate Turn's to Love 📕Critic Member: Khalessi (MessDan)
📌Palala ang iyong mababasa ay sariling opinyon at pananaw ng napiling kritiko sa iyong pinasang akda.
📌Panatilihing bukas anh pag-unawa habang nagbabasa ng kabanatang ito. Maari mong ipahayag ang iyong reaksyin sa pamamagitan ng pagkomento.
📌Prologue- Chapter 5 po ang pinagbasihan ko sa critique na ito. ⏩⏩⏩⏩⏩⏩⏩⏩⏩⏩⏩⏩⏩
💥Book Cover:
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It was an average cover for me. Hindi ako masyadong nakakita ng wow factor pati na rin relevance niya sa kwento mo mismo. Hindi rin nalagay riyan ang author's name mo.
I was just guessing na 'yong dalawang tao sa cover sila na ang leading characters mo. Malinis naman siya at madaling basahin kaso hindi siya enough talaga na maka-agaw ng attention mo. It is a fact that people judge books by their covers. Alam ko na hindi ito magandang batayan ng kakayahan ml bilang manunulat pero aminin na natin ang katotohanan na kung gusto mo talagang mapansin kelangan mo rin magpapansin.
💥Title: Can Hate Turn's to Love
Ok, I know na pinalitan mo na ang title ng kwento mo mula sa The More You Hate, The More You Love. It was a good decision dahil honestly laspag na aang unang title. May mga iilan lang akong saloobin tungkol sa bago mong pamagat.
📌Una mali ang grammar niya. Using an apostrophe S ('s) implies ownership for the proper noun it follows or used as a short cut for pronouns followed by is or was.
Example for ownership: Maria's bag José's dog Diana's boyfriend
Example for short cut: He is- He's She was- She's It is - It's
📌 In your title, Turn's to Love is grammatical suicide. Turn is a verb so it cannot hold ownership. Turn is not a pronoun.
The correct way of writing your title should be: Can Hate Turn to Love.
📌Ngayon naman impact wise medyo pumalya rin siya para sa'kin. Masyado na siyang generic at laganap. Medyo typical na rin ang pumapasok sa utak ko na plot. Your title should the whole book in only a few significant words. So far hindi siya significant para sa akin. Hindi rin ako masyadong na impress. Sorry.
💥Opening:
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