September 19th, 2018
There's only silence now, as I walk down the steps to the kitchen. It's all static in my ears. Today I decided to get up. With each stair I go down I'm closer to where it happened. You would never be able to tell, but I can still see it...I can still see all of it. I let my legs carry me, but they stop before the entrance, like they know, they read my mind. I stare blankly at the wall across from me before looking down at the wood floors at my feet.
It's been two weeks today, are the only words that lap through my mind. I blink, forbidding any tears to come. I can't will my legs to take a step forward, so I can begin to try to make my breakfast, they just stay still, refusing any encouragement I try to muster up to give.
And then I hear it, like I would any sound in this moment, it's so clear, so vibrant, his melodies. They play behind me and I can't help myself but turn my head around, ready to watch. Then it stops, and I'm staring at the empty piano in the sitting room. It's keys haven't been touched in two weeks.
I turn back to my predicament, and I take a small breath, but I feel even that isn't coming out the same way it used to. It's suffocated and empty. Move legs, please...just move.
"You can't just stand here forever, you know," I hear his voice for the second time in my ear, the first was when I couldn't fall back asleep last night, but it sounds more real, like he's standing behind me, so I picture him there.
"I can if I want to," the words slip out before I can even form them as thoughts. My voice is sharp and it surprises me. I haven't heard my own voice in almost two days.
Come back, just come back...I formulate in my head but can't find the strength to say it out loud.
I play around with my silver wedding band on my finger, twisting it, stalling my decision. I think about his wedding ring that's secure on a chain around my neck and how it shouldn't be there.
The day I met him comes rushing back, every sight, every sound, every smell, and I can't stop it. The weight of it is too much, so I slide to the ground and just close my eyes, and all the colors that some up that day stretches out and covers every corner of my mind.
YOU ARE READING
Under This Chaotic Rain
Teen FictionI understood him, yet at the same time, I couldn't... But he understood me, more than I understood myself. He was a mystery that would always put a smile on my face; a mystery I was alright not solving. When I looked at him, like really looked at h...
