After James // phan

confidential pt. 4

My investigation didn't end with the yearbook. I spent more time than was probably healthy scouring the internet for any trace of Dan Howell. Though to my disappointment I didn't find much. Not even a Facebook page.

Which put an abrupt halt to my investigation, and provided me with zero means of contacting him. But I was an optimist, and I had hope that I would run into him again.

And perhaps prompted by sheer faith alone there was a knock on my door. It was considerably late– well past the appropriate hours to knock on someone's door - but early enough for me to still be up and browsing tumblr, so I didn't mind too much.

I especially didn't mind when I saw who was at the door. Darcy was there, looking considerably chirpier than she was earlier, but she only held my attention for a fraction of a second. Because James was there too, and that's who my eyes locked onto.

"Hi," I said a little breathlessly. I was shocked to say the least. This wasn't what I was expecting. Yeah, I hoped I'd see him again, but so quickly after our first encounter? Only minutes after I'd abandoned my online stalking? The timing was unreal.

James made no move to greet me in return. Instead, he gazed at his shoes and ignored me entirely. Darcy was quick to fill the silence. "Hi! Sorry it's kind of late. I just wanted to thank you properly for today. So I made you these."

She held out a clear plastic container filled with cupcakes, all expertly frosted and decorated with sprinkles and glitter. "I would have waited until tomorrow but I wanted to get it out of the way, and they're better when they're fresh," she grinned.

"You didn't have to do that," I said, using all of my will power to tear my eyes away from James and look at Darcy when addressing her. It was an extremely difficult feat.

Darcy continued to hold the cupcakes out to me. "Just take them, okay? My arm's hurting." I laughed and took them off of her, thanking her as I did so. "I also came around to introduce you to my husband, James."

At long last James looked up and met my eyes. It was him. It was Dan. There was no doubt in my mind. But how could he be Dan? Why did he deny it?

"We've met actually," I said casually, carefully observing James', or I guess Dan's, facial expressions. A brief flicker of alarm sparked behind his eyes, and he opened his mouth to say something. I beat him to it, however. "Today, at the grocery store," I clarified.

Relief was evident on his face. I mean I thought it was evident. But maybe I was reading too much into it. Maybe I was only seeing what I wanted to see; grasping at straws so that I could validate my theory.

"What a small world, huh?" Darcy said, pulling me out of my own thoughts and back into reality.

It really was. There was me hoping that I'd get to run into James again and next thing you know he's my new neighbour. Thank you, universe, for answering my prayers. "Would you two like to come in?" I offered, stepping back and gesturing to the inside of my apartment.

Just as Darcy responded with "Sure," James spoke up, answering with "No thank you." I raised my eyebrows and waited for their collective answer.

Darcy seemed to win the silent war that raged between the two of them, fought only with eye contact and telepathy. "Yes, we would love too," she said, and James, frowning slightly, nodded reluctantly.

They followed me to the lounge room. My yearbook lay open on the picture of Dan and I subtly swept it up and placed it under the coffee table as I took a seat.

I caught James watching me out of the corner of his eye and I wondered if perhaps I wasn't as subtle as I thought I was. If he had caught a glimpse of the yearbook and realised what I'd been doing. I couldn't say for sure, though. His face gave nothing away.

They didn't stay for long, and we chatted about nothing of importance. The whole time I was studying James. Studying Darcy. Studying the way they interacted with each other. And it only confused me even more.

They seemed normal. They both talked about their pasts so casually: where they grew up, how they met, the schools they went to. I found nothing out of the ordinary, and nothing to spark suspicion.

But it was a lie, I knew it was. At least James' side of the story. But then he told it so convincingly. He didn't hesitate before answering. He didn't stumble over words. He knew what he was talking about.

I wondered if Darcy knew he was lying. Does she know his real name? Is she in on the whole thing or completely clueless to her husband's secret identity?

Why did he have a secret identity in the first place? Was he a fugitive? An undercover agent, perhaps? The possibilities were endless, and each one was just as ludicrous as the next. But it was fun to fantasise.

"We'd better be off. It was nice to properly meet you. You know, when I'm not swearing and kicking at inanimate objects," Darcy joked. She stood up to leave, lacing her fingers with James'.

I didn't want them to leave. I was having fun letting my imagination roam free. But it was very late. "Thanks again for the cupcakes. I'll see you around, yeah?"

"Definitely," smiled Darcy, as James nodded along, albeit unenthusiastically. He looked eager to leave. And so I bade them goodnight, being sure to address James by name to study his reaction. But again, I didn't receive much of one. He'd perfected his poker face throughout the night.

I crashed pretty soon after they left, my dreams starring James and the occasional talking cupcake. I had a feeling that James would be taking up a lot of space in my brain for the foreseeable future.

Not that I would mind. Not one bit.

(written by the gorgeous  @phanoutlet)