"I Couldn't Hate You..."

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X.

"Loving you wasn't hard, staying in love wasn't hard, bearing your absence was difficult, hating you wasn't credible... But what was impossible was my mind not projecting you knowing I'll cry..."

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Dear Ray,

          Remember our stage rehearsal? I was about to open my heart to you. "Raymond, I said somedays back that I hated the people with the name Raymond—" you didn't let me complete, Raymond. You started saying "I hate Gwen" like a mantra. I was about to say "I couldn't hate you" but you acted before me.

          But, Raymond... Why did you had to pull Sasha in it? To went to her and said that if she loves you than she's to kiss you... And you know what, Raymond? She did kiss you and was saying me that I shouldn't talk to her she's a ditcher. I was about to say "No one can know that better than me, bitch. Just what kind of a ditcher are you." But I  didn't, Ray. It was really on my tongue.

          It was the second time I ever cried, Ray. But, you don't need to know that. You need not to know the fact that that was the first time I cried after the death of my best friend. No... You don't need to know that, because what you did next showed me exactly what kind d of a person you were.

          " I. L. U. G. And. S. I'm sorry. I was just testing what would've happened if a situation like this does arise." I wasted my first love, my first kiss and my valuable tears on someone like you, Raymond but I still couldn't hate you. I still wanted you...

Your sincerely,
Gwendolyn.

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