Six months. Six months after leaving the Mafia, and you still couldn't get Akutagawa off your mind. You know that you had to leave, but you never wanted to be without him.
When you left, he made it apparent that he had feelings, but he cared more about how you felt than his own feelings.
You wanted to forget. Forget the pained look on his face as you left, but you couldn't. You wanted more than anything to be there with him.
"(Y/n), come with me," Dazai said to you as you sat at your desk staring off into space.
"Dazai, I'm thinking of just going home instead," you told him and he shook his head.
"You really need to come with me. I promise it'll help," he stated before he came over to you and he sat on top of your desk and your papers.
"Get off you lunatic," you said, somewhat irritably.
"Not till you agree to come with me," Dazai chirped and gave you a smirk. That smirk was adorable, but also the look of pure evil.
"What did you do?" You asked him and he just chuckled.
"Would you just come with me? I promise it isn't that bad." Dazai whined.
"Jeez, alright," you said and he hopped off your desk as you stood up. He shoved his hands in his pockets as you walked next to him. You both left the office and you trailed behind him, as you had no idea of where you were going.
He started to lead you down a dark alley and fear crept through you.
"Dazai, what's going on?" You asked him.
"(Y/n)," a voice said from behind you. You jumped, but an arm wrapped around your waist, pulling you to him.
"Akutagawa?" You asked in disbelief.
"You have been really depressed, and I know it's because you love him. You two need to talk things out," Dazai explained before walking back out the alley. "I'll be out on the sidewalk when you are ready to head back to the office."
You were trembling as you knew you were in Aku's arms. It felt so comforting to be with him.
He turned you in his arms before wrapping them around you and pulling you so your face was buried in his chest.
"Why didn't you tell me how upset you were? Did I play a role in you leaving?" He asked me, sounding angry, but you knew it was to disguise the pain he was feeling.
"I wanted to stay because of you," you mumbled into his chest. "But I couldn't, I felt like I wanted to kill myself." Tears were flowing out of your eyes onto Aku.
"Why didn't you come to me?" He growled out.
"I couldn't. Aku, you are a man that enjoys being in the Mafia," you explained to him. He pulled away from you and turned around. His hands formed into fists.
"Just because I don't hate it, doesn't mean I wouldn't help you," He explained before turning around. His face held pain and anger.
"Aku, you have to realize how you appear to everyone. I knew you were different, but how am I supposed to go to you?" You whispered. You couldn't tell him that you loved him. You couldn't tell him that every day you were fighting an internal war against yourself.
Akutagawa wasn't looking at you anymore. He looked so unsure of what to say. He walked over to you and cupped your chin with his hand and tilted your head so you looked up at him.
"I am sorry that I couldn't be there and help," Aku whispered.
"Aku, don't blame yourself for anything," you told him as he brought his face down to yours to press his lips to yours. The kiss was so gentle, you were surprised that Aku was so gentle. His hands moved down to grip your waist as he lightly kissed you.
He pulled away from me and held me to him.
"Aku, I'm sorry for leaving," you whispered and he shook his head.
"Don't be sorry. I know you did what you had to. But what are we going to do about us?" AKu asked.
"We can't be together," you hiccuped.
"Don't say that," he demanded.
"But you're in the Port Mafia and I'm in the ADA."
"That doesn't matter. We can still be together, it would just make things harder. You're not meant to be in the Mafia, and I'm not meant to be in the ADA. But you're the only person that I've ever wanted to be with." Aku set his chin on the top of your head, resting it there.
"(Y/n), are you soon ready? I'm getting bored," Dazai walked over to us and separated you and Aku.
"Damn it you bandaged bastard," Aku yelled and Dazai just smirked at him.
"Still touchy I see," Dazai laughed. "Listen, I know you have a lot on your mind about this (Y/n), but just give it a try. You have been so upset recently and I know it's because of him."
Dazai put his arm around you and Aku looked like he was going to punch Dazai. You quickly pulled away from Dazai.
"Why don't you fuck off for a bit Dazai and let us figure this out," Aku yelled at Dazai. "I won't let her get hurt, she'll come back to the ADA perfectly fine."
"If that's she wants then that's what she gets," Dazai said as he looked at you. You nodded your head and Dazai sighed.
"And here I thought I'd get to see more action. Oh well, I'm sure you two will be flaunting that relationship soon," Dazai said as he walked away, waving at you.
"God, he's so irritating," Aku groaned out. He casually took your hand and you jumped.
"Do you not want me to?" Aku asked you. You instantly told him that wasn't the case as he led you out of the alley.
"Let's go to this one cafe. No one will bother us there." Aku said as he led me to the cafe. He opened the door and there was hardly anyone in there.
"Akutagawa, it's been awhile since we've seen you," the man behind the counter said. Aku didn't say anything and led me to the back of the cafe.
"I never even knew this place was here," you mused as you looked at the decorations. They were simple, yet appealing. A light beige with a few dark accents.
"I would come here to hide out whenever I wanted Higuchi to leave me alone," Aku sighed.
"She still always on you?" You chuckled. You remembered him coming to you and complaining about her.
"It got so much worse when you left. I didn't know that both of you had feelings for me," Aku chuckled.
"Dimwit," you chuckled. Aku was kind of oblivious to things like that.
"Yeah, yeah, she's nuts though. She was definitely not happy that I kissed you."
"I was definitely surprised you did," you admitted. Aku just shook his head.
"I didn't think I'd see you again." He shrugged. "Dazai surprised me when he contacted me telling me that I needed to meet him in the alley. Talk about shady with that suicidal maniac."
"Ah, but you want to impress him," you said.
"Shut it. That's not actually my goal anymore," Aku said as he looked away from you.
"Dazai's opinion of me isn't the one that matters anymore," Aku explained.
Your face flushed as you assumed he was talking about you.
"If you don't want to be with me, I understand. I'm not nice, I'm not someone who really can be a great partner, hell I was convinced that I never wanted anyone. But I want you."
"Aku," you whispered to him. You wanted him so bad. What would it hurt if you tried to go out with him? You cared for him more than anything. He's been so nice, and not even like his normal self.
"I want to be with you," you told him. He gave you a cheeky smirk and you rolled your eyes. You missed him so much.
"I guess I owe that bandaged bastard," Aku chuckled as he took my hand on the table and held it in his own.
"Me too," you chuckled as you spend the rest of the afternoon being with the one that made you happy.
