Laughter [Tobuscus/Toby Turner]

Chapter Fourteen

Every day and every night, I stay with Toby. By his side. Always making sure he's okay. Distracting him from reality, for the time being.

After a while, I decide it's best if we go out and get some fresh air. I wake up one morning to find Toby still sleeping, and I roll over to see his eyelids shut, his lips slightly parted. I kiss his nose, and he scrunches his face up before opening his eyes, staring into mine. His hazel irises have faded with the pressure of loss, and he doesn't say a word before wrapping his arms around me and pulling me close. "Do you want to go out today, Toby?" I ask hesitantly into his chest, and he groans, his wrists pressing into my back as he holds me closer. I think for a minute. "Here, I know where we can go, you just have to get dressed," I say, looking up to meet his eyes.

He looks down at me, then rolls over and slides out of bed. I do the same and meet him at the end of the bed, kissing him for a second before heading to my closet and taking out an outfit that consists of blue jeans and a tobuscus tee. After getting dressed, i slide into my jacket and meet Toby in the living room. Eventually he emerges from the bathroom wearing a hoodie, holding the cuffs of the sleeves with his hands and rocking back and forth on his heels like a kid. What a dork.

We get in the car, and I drive because I'm the only one that knows where we're going. He doesn't say much, despite my relentless attempts to talk to him, and eventually I tell him to close his eyes as I pull up outside of our destination. I ease him out of the car, leaves cracking beneath our feet as I link our arms and walk in the direction of our special place, eventually sweeping away some branches and arriving at the lake.

He opens his eyes.

As he looks around, I shuffle over to the lake and sit down, patting the ground beside me. The pink leaves have fallen off the trees, leaving a dusting of pink on the ground, and the branches are bare. Toby comes and sits down beside me, looking at the sky.

It's quiet for a while until Toby clears his throat.

"Cassie... there's, um, there's something..." He stutters, and I look over at him. He's twiddling his thumbs, his eyes focused on the ground. I sit up straight, facing my whole body towards his.

"Toby?" I ask, but he won't meet my gaze. Instead a little tear glistens right under his eye, threatening to fall.

"I love you, Cassie. I really, really love you. And I hope you won't be mad, or upset. I just..." His voice dies, and I search his face frantically, waiting for something. Anything.

My heart drops to my stomach as he slowly tugs his sleeve up his arm.

Six thin, crooked, razor-sharp lines, all in a row, run along his wrist. I gasp, blinking hard, my hand going over my mouth. No matter how hard I try, I can't seem to tear my eyes away from the cuts on his arm. He keeps staring at me, waiting, waiting for a response that I don't know how to give. So instead I just let a tear fall, let gravity pull it down and splatter it on his wrists.

And then it's quiet.

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