Succulents on the Window Sill

Chapter 26

She knew that she was biased, but the ring on her finger was the most beautiful one that Corinne had ever seen.

The gold was so colourful against the grey world that she seemed to live in, the diamond was her sparkling light. 

It was a simple ring, a smooth thin gold band, with a small circular stone. It was practical, not likely to catch on her hair, or on passing objects. It wasn't overly glamorous or luxurious, but it was hers. Corinne only wished that it had been placed on her finger in a much happier way.

After Zach had left, she had sat on the bottom step of the stairs waiting for him to come back. Thirty minutes must have passed, before she moved to the kitchen table. Eventually, when the second mug of coffee was cold, and her toes numb against the floor tiles, Corinne had given up.

Zach wasn't going to return. He had work to go to.

Corinne had made her way upstairs, dressing in her work uniform, before giving her hair a quick brush. She wasn't in the mood for makeup, for cute earrings, for trying out what cool styles she could do with the new haircut. She didn't want anything right now but Zach.

Zach's hoodie had been stripped off to allow her to dress, Corinne tugged it back on again before she left the bedroom. It was cold, and the soft fabric against her bare arms, the scent of his skin against hers, it was the only comfort Corinne could find right now. 

She grabbed her keys and bag downstairs, knowing there was no point in waiting for a man who was likely sliding in behind his work desk right now. Corinne would see him tonight, and although she didn't know how to, she would show him that she loved him. She wanted him, their relationship, just as much as he did.

The drive to work was filled with the usual morning chaos, but Corinne felt numb. Her heart was aching, and the ring on her finger was only a reminder of it.

She should be sitting in a traffic jam gazing at it with a huge grin on her face, remembering the moment when Zach had asked her the question that usually went along with such jewellery. He hadn't asked though, all he had asked was for her to show him her true feelings. It was something that Corinne felt so ashamed to have never done.

She had yet to tell him that she loved him, even though she had known for ages now that she was falling. Over the past week though, Corinne had known for sure. Zach was her life, her future, and the thought of being without him was tearing her heart to shreds.

He was right that soft smiles and nodding along with his dreams were not good enough. That didn't spell out what Corinne wanted, only that she was flattered and willing to go along with whatever Zach said. It didn't show how she really felt, and that was what he needed. 

How could she expect Zach to be secure when she had never given him a good reason to be? When he had been thinking of them and their future, she had still been pushing him to stay with Sara.

Sara. Her fingers drummed restlessly on the steering wheel at the thought of Zach telling her the truth. He was right that they couldn't get on with their lives how things were, Sara needed to know, and the weight of their secret needed to be free from their shoulders. It was terrifying to think of though. To lose Sara, to have the truth out in the open, for all eyes and lips to judge. 

All Corinne wanted was a little time. Time to give in her notice at the bakery and leave, to get a new job at her mum's shop or somewhere. Time to create a distance from Sara. It made her heart race with fear that Zach wasn't going to give her that. He hadn't even given her a chance to explain those reasons for wishing to wait. Their argument hadn't been fair, nothing was fair right now.