Harry Potter One Shots

(2) The Balance of Emotions

All rights belong to the author, mallemus

"I will not accept this kind of behaviour," Severus said, as he closed the book he had in his hands.

A wrinkle ran across Harry's forehead. "What kind of behaviour?"

Severus turned his back to Harry and began stirring the potion in the cauldron. "Your laziness, I simply will not tolerate it."

Harry stared at Severus as he added another ingredient to the potion. I'm not lazy. Harry thought to himself as he slid down from the chair and walked over to Severus just in time for Harry to see how to finish the potion.

"Now," Severus started, "do you remember any of this?" He raised his eyebrows and looked at Harry with curious eyes.

With a steady voice, he answered, much to Severus's surprise. "Yes, I do, because I'm not lazy." He finished the sentence with a smirk and a twinkle in his eye.

Severus gestured that Harry could take his place at the simmering cauldron.

"Very well, if you say you remember how to make this potion, then I suggest you begin to prepare it, as opposed to standing there as some haughty prince." Severus was amused with the terrified look on Harry's face that quickly turn into his usual reserved façade.

Harry hummed as he walked to the shelf with the ingredients.

"No humming, it will distract you," Severus said while watching Harry grab the wrong ingredient.

Harry sighed loudly as he grabbed the aconite. "I know what I'm doing. I have studied this potion for a week now."

Severus shook his head and walked over to the shelf where Harry was standing. "And yet you took the aconite when you needed the asphodel."

Severus placed a hand on Harry's shoulder and looked at him with an irritated glance. "You need to stay focused. I will not let you make a fool out of yourself in my class or show off."

Harry looked at his feet as he scratched his neck. He knew that he had disappointed Severus by acting as if he had been paying attention when he actually had been daydreaming about attending Hogwarts.

Harry looked up and tried to hide that fact that he was embarrassed. "I'm sorry, professor. I'll do better."

Harry straightened his back and was walking over to the cauldron when Severus stopped him.

"What did I just say about the ingredient and staying focused? Aconite now, please." Severus held out his hand.

With a shaking hand, Harry gave back the aconite, without looking into Severus's eyes. You could almost cut through the embarrassment that was present in the room, at that moment all Harry wanted to do was to disappear.

Severus could see how embarrassed Harry was and he pitied him. Tomorrow would be the first of September and Harry was going to attend Hogwarts. Of course, the boy was daydreaming and possible thinking about if he would make any friends and how his first year at Hogwarts would be. Severus hoped that Harry would make new friends or at least have a better experience with Hogwarts than Severus had had himself.

As far as Severus knew Harry had one friend but he hoped for the boy to have more than one. Even though Draco was a good friend to Harry, he did not quit contribute when it came to intelligence and Harry needed that, he needed someone to push him in the right direction. Though Severus did not really have any doubt when it came to Harry staying on the right path, the boy was smart he would know the difference between right and wrong.

Severus looked tenderly at Harry who was currently fiddling with a loose thread on his robe. How is it possible that I have grown to care for the boy of the man I once despised so much? Severus had had that thought before and the answer was always the same. Because he's Lily's boy too.

Severus cleared his throat and caught Harry's attention. "You have a long day ahead of you tomorrow, so I suggest that you go to bed now."

To anyone else that grimace Severus made would not have been seen as a smile, but to Harry it was. With a small nod Harry walked out of the room and went to bed, or at least he tried to. It was past midnight before Harry could finally close his eyes. His many thoughts about Hogwarts had kept him awake for so long that he completely had forgotten the time. Harry wanted to talk to Severus about how scared he was, but showing fear would equal having a weakness which was not an option. Harry, therefore, decided to keep quiet and suppress the fear, there simply was no room for that kind of foolishness.

xXxXxXx

Platform 9¾ was packed with wizards and witches who were talking loudly and showing of new robes or animals.

As Harry walked towards the train he passed a family comprised of only red-haired. Harry was familiar with who the family was, but he had never talked with any of them, even though their youngest son was the same age as himself.

At the far end of the platform, Harry spotted Draco and two other boys who he had never met, but both of them made him wrinkle his nose. Harry shook his head, straightened himself and tried to ignore the people surrounding him.

On the outside, Harry looked calm and in control, but that was far from the truth. Because on the inside it felt as if every emotion Harry could think of had started a riot.

When he woke up that morning all he could think of was how eager he was to leave for Hogwarts, but as he stood there in front of the Hogwarts Express, all he could think of was how much he wanted to turn around.

Stop being such a baby. You're already ahead of most of your peers, why are you even thinking of turning around? You have waited for this for so long, keep going. Harry clutched onto his suitcase and the birdcage where a jet black barn owl was staring at him with a confused look.

"As if you wouldn't be afraid too." Mumbled Harry to Arvin, who just tucked his head under his wing.

Shaking his head Harry proceeded walking towards the train, as the last bit of doubt left him.